Tag: personal blog

  • Sunday Things #11

    This week felt like somebody put my life on shuffle.

    There was absolutely no transition between anything.

    One minute I was sick.

    The next I was dancing.

    Then there were children.

    So many children.

    A brand-new baby entered the world.

    Somebody threw a desk.

    Somebody else refused to nap.

    And apparently my boyfriend can sleep through me falling on the floor but possesses some kind of supernatural boob-detection system.

    So.

    You know.

    A normal week.

    😂

    Monday started at 2:30 in the damn morning with another visit from the tummy goblin.

    I spent the next five hours running back and forth to the bathroom wondering what the actual fuck was happening to me.

    Again.

    By 7:30, I had officially accepted defeat.

    I called out of work.

    And I spent essentially the entire day in bed.

    That was Monday.

    Beautiful.

    Thriving.

    Living my best life.

    😮‍💨

    Wednesday, I absolutely took the day off too—but that one was planned.

    Listen.

    If I get home at 12:30 in the morning, I am NOT waking up at six to spend eight hours chasing an autistic baby around.

    Could I?

    Probably.

    Was I going to?

    Absolutely fucking not.

    😂

    Apparently my alarm still went off, though.

    My boyfriend told me he had to climb over me to turn it off.

    I did not wake up.

    Not once.

    I regret nothing.

    Later that evening, Mom called because she wanted to go shopping with the kiddos and her fibromyalgia was acting up, so I went with her.

    Then I came home, turned on Monster: The Lizzie Borden Story, and hid the remote from my boyfriend so he couldn’t change it.

    😂

    He walked in maybe three minutes after I started it, sat down, and actually watched the entire first episode with me.

    Then started asking questions.

    Lots of questions.

    Until eventually I realized something horrifying:

    this man did not know who Lizzie Borden was.

    😮🫣

    So apparently part of being in a relationship with me now includes mandatory historical true-crime education.

    I don’t make the rules.

    He went to bed after episode one because he was exhausted, and I stayed up for another episode like the responsible adult I am.

    Thursday was funny because when I first started writing my notes for the week, I genuinely wrote:

    I don’t remember Thursday.

    😂

    I thought maybe it had just been one of those completely average days where I worked, came home, showered, ate dinner, watched CaseOh, and went to bed.

    Then my brain slowly started handing me Thursday back.

    Oh yeah.

    I got my nails done.

    Then Doodoo called because he missed me, so I stopped at CVS to get the prenatal vitamins my doctor told me to start taking and went over to my sister’s house.

    I helped her feed the kids, do bath time, and get everybody ready for bed.

    Doodoo kept pointing at my watch saying:

    “Uncle.”

    So I video-called Uncle.

    I honestly didn’t expect him to answer because Thursdays are normally his late days.

    Except—

    he was home.

    He had the day off.

    Of course he did.

    😂

    Eventually I left my sister’s house, got all the way home, realized I forgot cat food, and had to leave AGAIN.

    Then I finally came home.

    Showered.

    Ate.

    Went to bed.

    Apparently Thursday wasn’t forgettable.

    Thursday was just long as hell.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    Friday night, I came home from work, sat in my recliner for what felt like forever, took a shower…

    and realized something.

    The house didn’t feel right.

    The boys weren’t there.

    And apparently I have become so accustomed to spending my weekends surrounded by tiny people screaming, climbing on me, stealing my food, and demanding cartoons that silence now feels suspicious.

    😂

    So I went to my sister’s house and got them.

    We came home.

    We ate.

    And somehow—

    neither one fought sleep.

    Not even a little.

    They just went to bed.

    I almost checked their temperatures.

    😂

    But honestly?

    Having them there felt right.

    Even when they drive me absolutely insane, I notice when they aren’t around.

    Apparently my peaceful weekends have been permanently replaced by toddler chaos.

    And apparently—

    I’m okay with that.


    📷 Through My Lens

    Tuesday.

    Y’all.

    Tuesday.

    The Pretty Reckless is my favorite band.

    And my boyfriend made sure I got to see them.

    I have said this already and I will continue saying it forever:

    If that man never buys me another gift again, I am completely okay with that.

    Because he gave me that night.

    🥲🖤

    And I got to share it with someone I love dearly.

    One of my best friends trusted me enough to let his daughter come with me.

    I have watched her and her brother grow from little kids in booster seats who needed help bathing into teenagers with opinions and personalities approximately fourteen times larger than their actual bodies.

    😂

    And lately, she has been carrying some things.

    They are not my things to share.

    What people tell me in confidence stays with me.

    But watching her laugh?

    Dance?

    Cut loose?

    Forget everything else for a few hours and just enjoy herself?

    That meant more to me than I can explain.

    And somehow—

    we both got to touch Taylor Momsen.

    😭

    I still cannot believe that sentence is real.

    As for me?

    I was VIBING.

    That is genuinely the best description I have.

    I drank water all night and danced so hard that halfway through the show my hair was completely soaked.

    My friend’s daughter looked at me and started laughing.

    😂

    Afterward, people actually came up to me and told me they had fun watching me dance and enjoy myself.

    Apparently I became part of the entertainment.

    Whoops.

    I did have one man yell at me about where I was standing before The Pretty Reckless even came on.

    I apologized.

    Moved.

    And he proceeded to glare at me for the rest of the night.

    Okay.

    You do you, boo.

    We had shit to do.

    😂

    We were there to dance.

    Make memories.

    And scream songs we love at the top of our lungs.

    And that is exactly what we did.

    The next day, I went through all my pictures.

    And I got some really fucking good ones.

    My friend even told me I could tag him in my Facebook post.

    Which I hadn’t planned on doing because—

    well.

    Crazy ex-wife situations.

    😂

    Then he told me I could post some pictures of his daughter too, as long as her face wasn’t showing.

    Say less.

    I was ridiculously careful about which ones I chose, and he approved every single picture before I posted it.

    And I know that sounds like such a small thing.

    But it isn’t to me.

    Being trusted like that matters.

    A lot.

    I love photography.

    I love concerts.

    I love the weird little moments my camera catches.

    But I think some photographs become important because of everything happening outside the frame.

    And I think those pictures are going to be some of my favorites for a very long time.


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    Friday afternoon, one of my friends sent me:

    “wyd.?”

    And immediately—

    I KNEW.

    😂

    I told my sister:

    “Hold on. I might have to come get the boys later.”

    Because—

    MY FRIEND HAD HER BABY.

    MY FRIEND HAD HER BABY!!!!

    😭🖤

    I was so excited.

    But then I thought about it.

    She had literally just had a human being.

    And I had just survived one of the longest workdays of my life.

    So I decided not to immediately show up at the hospital and insert myself into her first day with her baby.

    Growth.

    😂

    Don’t misunderstand me.

    I am absolutely going to be all in her business.

    But I can give the woman a minute first.

    Saturday got completely consumed by toddler chaos, so I stayed home again.

    Then today I texted her because I felt bad that I hadn’t made it up there yet.

    She asked if I wanted to come visit once they’re home.

    Baby boy just needed to pee so they could hopefully get discharged.

    😂

    And she sent me pictures.

    Y’ALL.

    That baby is beautiful.

    I haven’t seen a baby that gorgeous since Doodoo was born.

    And now I’m sitting here ridiculously excited because I get to meet him soon.

    But I think there’s something I’m learning as I get older:

    loving people doesn’t always mean immediately showing up.

    Sometimes it means giving them room.

    Letting them breathe.

    Letting them settle.

    And letting them know:

    I’m here whenever you’re ready.

    I’m still going to squeeze that baby as soon as I’m allowed, though.

    Obviously.

    😂


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    My boyfriend’s mom.

    Easy.

    Saturday?

    Those boys were ON ONE.

    Hitting.

    Headbutting.

    Throwing shit.

    Fighting each other.

    Crying.

    Just being complete little assholes to one another all day.

    😮‍💨

    At one point, Doodoo finally went down for another nap.

    Pooh Boy eventually crawled into the recliner with us and passed out too.

    And when Mawmaw Nesi came through the door, I was terrified she was going to wake him.

    Thankfully—

    she didn’t.

    Doodoo woke up a little later when he heard water running in the kitchen.

    He sat up.

    Looked me dead in my eyes.

    And said:

    “Where is she?”

    Where is who, bub?

    “Mawmaw.”

    She’s in the kitchen doing dishes.

    This half-asleep child launched himself off my lap and stumbled toward the kitchen like a tiny drunk person.

    “Mawmaw!”

    😂

    She picked him up.

    He changed his mind and wanted me again.

    Naturally.

    But after a cake pop, both boys wandered into the kitchen and started “helping” her with dishes.

    And suddenly?

    Nobody was climbing on me.

    Nobody was crying in my face.

    Nobody needed anything.

    For approximately half an hour.

    Y’all.

    Bless that woman.

    😂

    I will never not appreciate those little breaks.

    Especially on weekends when the children apparently wake up and collectively decide:

    Today, we choose violence.

    Sometimes gratitude is deep and meaningful.

    Sometimes gratitude is somebody taking the toddlers into another room for thirty minutes.

    Both count.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    I had OPTIONS this week.

    Friday at work deserves honorable mention.

    My kiddo was having an absolutely horrible day.

    And when I say horrible—

    I mean I got hit by him.

    Hit by two other kiddos.

    And my kiddo threw his desk—and himself—at me three separate times.

    Lunch was running behind because they ran out of fries, and apparently that was enough to trigger the apocalypse.

    He had two bathroom accidents too, which was really unusual because he hasn’t had those with me in almost a year.

    By the end of the day?

    We figured it out.

    He was constipated.

    🤦🏻‍♀️

    Sir.

    You terrorized an entire building because you needed to poop.

    And yes.

    Once he finally did—

    his mood improved dramatically.

    Of course it did.

    😂

    Then Saturday happened.

    Pooh Boy’s visit got canceled because the person picking him up had car trouble.

    Okay.

    Whatever.

    Except Pooh Boy then decided he was simply not going to nap.

    At all.

    So by late afternoon, this child was operating entirely on spite.

    Eventually he passed out for maybe thirty minutes.

    And honestly?

    I celebrated that thirty minutes like I had personally won the lottery.

    😂

    Later, Uncle got home and cooked dinner.

    Everybody sat down.

    Doodoo pointed at the television.

    “BLAHBLAH! I watch!”

    You watch what?

    “CaseOh!”

    I had seven minutes left in my show.

    Seven.

    So I asked:

    Can BlahBlah finish this first?

    “No! CaseOh!”

    …

    Fine.

    CaseOh it is.

    Apparently I no longer own the television in my own house.

    Cool.

    😂

    And then Sunday morning?

    Uncle accidentally woke Pooh Boy up early.

    Pooh Boy immediately started yelling:

    “Guncle! Guncle!”

    Which is how he says Uncle and I’m sorry, but Guncle is the cutest damn thing ever.

    You cannot change my mind.

    Unfortunately, the yelling woke Doodoo.

    So suddenly all four of us were awake.

    Early.

    On.

    A.

    Sunday.

    Absolutely not.

    I grabbed Pooh Boy and put him in our bed.

    Now listen to me, little boy.

    Do NOT make this a habit.

    He nodded.

    We are all going back to sleep.

    He nodded again.

    Everybody understood the assignment.

    Doodoo went back to sleep.

    Uncle went back to sleep.

    I went back to sleep.

    Eventually I woke up halfway off the bed with my entire right arm asleep.

    I very carefully rolled over.

    Pooh Boy?

    Still asleep.

    Thank goodness.

    😂

    Around eight, I realized he was awake only because his breathing changed.

    I kept my eyes closed because if he was going to be quiet—

    I was going to enjoy it.

    Eventually he started rubbing my arm.

    “BlahBlah.”

    “BlahBlah.”

    Fine.

    I’m awake.

    😂

    Honestly?

    If that’s how I have to wake up on a Sunday morning, I guess I can live with it.


    And now it’s Sunday afternoon.

    Doodoo had smoked sausage and a baked potato for lunch and apparently approved of my cooking.

    Uncle has been playing his game.

    I’ve been sitting on the couch.

    Doodoo has alternated between playing peacefully and crying about whatever injustice toddlers are experiencing at any given moment.

    😂

    He even squeezed in one last little nap.

    I’m about to take him home.

    Then I’m coming back here.

    Cleaning the living room.

    Finishing laundry.

    And after that?

    I am doing absolutely fucking nothing.

    🤗

    This week started with me stuck in bed while my stomach attempted to ruin my life.

    Somewhere in the middle, I danced until my hair was soaked, watched someone I love forget her worries for a few hours, learned my boyfriend has never received adequate Lizzie Borden education, celebrated a brand-new baby entering the world, and spent the weekend surrounded by tiny people who apparently believe peace is optional.

    And somehow?

    I’m ending the week tired—

    but really fucking happy.

    I keep saying it lately, but I mean it:

    I love my little life.

    It’s loud.

    It’s chaotic.

    It rarely goes according to plan.

    And somebody almost always needs something from me.

    But there are people here I love.

    People who trust me.

    Kids who miss me when I’m gone.

    A man who makes ridiculous things possible for me.

    Friends whose lives I get to witness.

    Babies I get to watch grow.

    And a house that somehow feels a little too quiet when certain tiny feet aren’t running through it.

    That’s a pretty damn good life.

    Even with the tummy goblins.

    😂

    Until next time,

    —Destiny

    P.S. What’s one thing from your week—big or completely ordinary—that made you stop for a second and think, “I really love my little life”?

  • Sunday Things #10

    Some weeks make absolutely no sense while you’re living them.

    You just keep moving from one thing to the next, wondering what the hell could possibly happen now.

    And then Sunday gets here.

    You look back at everything that happened over the last seven days and realize…

    Oh.

    Apparently the answer was a lot.

    😂

    This week had some really good moments.

    Some really shitty ones.

    A few that were both.

    And several that I’m pretty sure could only happen to me.

    But somewhere in the middle of all of it, I kept finding these little moments that made everything else feel a little less heavy.

    A kid who’s getting way too big crawling into my lap like he still fits there perfectly.

    A friend who knew when I needed somebody to listen instead of give advice.

    A four-year-old noticing that one of my nails didn’t match and deciding she needed to fix it for me.

    Nothing huge.

    Just little things.

    And apparently those are the things I carried with me the most this week.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    Monday, my kiddo at work crawled into my lap while I was sitting in the rocker.

    My immediate thought was:

    Awh! He wants cuddles! Sweet boy!

    Nope.

    Well…

    Kind of.

    He wrapped his hand around my throat—

    and fell asleep.

    🥲😂

    Literally put himself to sleep.

    This boy has not taken a nap at school in almost a year, aside from the occasional one when he’s sick.

    I don’t know if he missed me that much while I was gone.

    I don’t know if he was just exhausted.

    Maybe both.

    But he slept in my lap for about 45 minutes while I rocked him.

    I moved his hand from my throat because, you know…

    breathing.

    But other than that?

    I didn’t move him.

    My arm fell asleep.

    My legs fell asleep.

    I stayed exactly where I was.

    When he finally woke up, he started giggling, nuzzled into me, and stayed there for another half hour.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I realized something.

    He’s gotten so big.

    Like…

    when the hell did that happen?

    I remember when holding him was easy.

    Picking him up was easy.

    Carrying him around was easy.

    Now this child is almost my height.

    Granted, I’m literally five feet tall and most fifth graders are probably going to tower over me soon, but STILL.

    😂

    He isn’t the little baby I originally started working with anymore.

    He’s growing up.

    Fast.

    And nobody really warns you about that part.

    Did I slowly watch him grow and somehow not notice?

    Did he hit some massive growth spurt while I was recovering from surgery?

    When exactly did this happen?

    I have questions.

    And I think the universe owes me some answers.


    Of course, the universe responded by making my muffler fall off my car as I was leaving work.

    ☠️

    Because apparently we couldn’t just have a sweet Monday.

    My friend from maintenance came and helped me tie it up well enough to get home, and I parked the car there for the night because my boyfriend worked late and I was NOT about to have that man crawling underneath my car at ten o’clock at night.

    Then came the game of:

    How the fuck am I getting to work tomorrow?

    Mom could take me, but I’d be two and a half hours late.

    My sister’s best friend couldn’t.

    Eventually, one of my coworkers texted me around ten that night and said he could pick me up.

    Problem solved.

    For approximately eight hours.

    Because then Tuesday happened.


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    Tuesday morning started with my mom.

    I called to tell her I didn’t need the ride to work anymore.

    She huffed.

    “Okay.”

    And hung up.

    Welllllll…

    OKKKKAAAAYYYYY then.

    I called her back because I still needed a ride home, and she literally has to pass my house anyway.

    She huffed again.

    “Okay.”

    I asked what was wrong.

    And suddenly we were having an entire argument about me being a bad daughter, having an attitude, yelling at her…

    Meanwhile, my boyfriend was in the bathroom with the door closed and could hear every word she was yelling through the phone I was holding to my ear.

    Then she hung up on me.

    So I called her back.

    And apparently Tuesday’s theme became:

    MATCHING ENERGY.

    I told her if she wanted to be a rude ass bitch to me that morning, she didn’t have to worry about giving me a ride.

    I didn’t need her.

    Just because she’s my mom doesn’t mean she has to be part of my life.

    She started to say something.

    I told her I didn’t give a fuck what she had to say anymore.

    And I hung up.

    Yay me.

    🙃

    So naturally, I called my best friend to vent.

    “I don’t know what to tell you. I told you so.”

    …

    Ma’am.

    I did not call for an I-told-you-so.

    Click.

    😂

    She texted me afterward.

    I opened the messages.

    Didn’t read them.

    I had reached my quota.

    Then another friend called me.

    The first thing she said was:

    “Your mom?”

    YES.

    MY MOM.

    😂

    “What happened?”

    And I told her.

    She didn’t tell me what I should have done.

    She didn’t give me an “I told you so.”

    She just listened.

    By the end of the conversation, she had me smiling and giggling.

    And I was okay again.

    That stayed with me.

    Sometimes you don’t need somebody to solve anything.

    Sometimes you don’t even need advice.

    Sometimes you just need somebody to let you be pissed off for a minute.


    Unfortunately, the universe was not finished with Tuesday.

    My doctor’s office messaged me saying my medication had been denied by insurance and that the delay was because I gave them the wrong pharmacy.

    So.

    Again.

    MATCHING ENERGY.

    I called.

    I spent about an hour on the phone trying to figure out what the hell was happening.

    The woman who answered offered to transfer me to the nurse who had sent the message.

    I specifically said:

    Absolutely not.

    I was not in the mood to give that woman a piece of my mind.

    Guess who she transferred me to?

    That exact nurse.

    “Imagine that. She transferred me to the one nurse I told her I don’t want to talk to today.”

    “Excuse me?”

    “You heard me right.”

    She tried to apologize.

    At that point, I didn’t want an apology.

    I wanted to know what the hell was happening with my shots and what my options were now.

    Then I talked to another nurse who kept interrupting me.

    “Ma’am! Please do NOT interrupt me while I’m talking to you. That’s very rude.”

    And then—

    “Okay.”

    With a huff.

    THAT FUCKING HUFFED ‘OKAY.’

    Apparently that was just the sound of Tuesday.

    😭

    Then I found out my gynecologist quit to work closer to home.

    Which…

    I completely understand.

    Good for her.

    Terrible for me.

    Because I actually liked her.

    Now I’m apparently being passed between the other four doctors at the practice, and I’m sorry, but the idea of four different gynecologists taking turns looking at my vagina does NOT sit right with me.

    At all.

    By this point, I was at work, stressed, overstimulated, playing phone tag with the doctor’s office—

    and my kiddo had decided that because I was on my phone, obviously he needed to participate.

    Trying to take my phone.

    Putting his ear against mine.

    Trying to listen.

    Trying to talk.

    Sir.

    You are nonverbal.

    This is not FaceTime.

    What are you trying to accomplish here?

    😭😂

    I was DONE.

    And then my boyfriend texted me.

    I opened it.

    And immediately started crying.

    Happy tears this time.

    He bought me two tickets to see The Pretty Reckless.

    MY FAVORITE BAND.

    I had already accepted that I was probably going to miss them because my first paycheck since surgery comes the day after the concert.

    I’d been upset about it all month.

    And on one of the shittiest mornings I’d had in a while, that man bought the tickets.

    My entire fucking day changed.

    I can die happy now.

    Well.

    After the concert.

    Obviously.

    😂

    And if I don’t?

    That man might be getting an engagement ring for Christmas because apparently I have decided I’m marrying him ASAP.

    The rest of Tuesday?

    Completely different day.

    My kiddo was on his best behavior.

    No more drama at work.

    I gave him a free day, and we had fun.

    My sister’s best friend picked me up.

    I went home.

    Showered.

    Picked out my outfit for Breaking Benjamin AND my outfit for The Pretty Reckless.

    And then Sissy called me.

    We stayed on the phone for an hour and a half.

    We barely talked.

    Every once in a while, one of us would say:

    “I love you.”

    And then we’d go right back to whatever we were doing.

    😂

    She’s four.

    Apparently we have already reached the stage of our relationship where neither of us needs to actually contribute anything to the phone call.

    We just need to know the other one is still there.

    And honestly?

    I kind of love that.

    My boyfriend eventually got home, and we spent the next hour and a half underneath my car trying to pull the muffler up enough for me to drive.

    I had to take a second shower because I was covered in dirt.

    By 9:40, I was finally ready to eat dinner and take my ass to bed.

    For a crappy-ass morning?

    It ended pretty nicely.


    📷 Through My Lens

    Wednesday morning began with one of the most horrifying situations I have ever found myself in.

    You are not ready for this story.

    I slept naked Tuesday night.

    And when I say naked, I mean—

    booty-ass fucking naked.

    We did the deed.

    I rolled over.

    Passed the fuck out.

    Fantastic ending to the night.

    Then my alarm went off Wednesday morning.

    I snoozed it.

    And slowly…

    my stomach started rumbling.

    Not hunger.

    No.

    This was a goblin.

    Something inside of me was trying to escape.

    I tried to get out of bed.

    I COULDN’T.

    My belly ring was attached to the bed.

    I’m lying on my stomach.

    Ass in the air.

    Completely naked.

    A gastrointestinal demon is rapidly approaching the exit.

    And I am physically tethered to my fucking bed by my belly button.

    😭😭😭

    I’m squeezing muscles I didn’t know I had.

    Fighting the bed.

    Trying to determine whether ripping my belly ring out would be preferable to what was about to happen.

    And finally—

    THE BED RELEASED ME.

    I ran to the bathroom naked.

    Sat down.

    And…

    shit started flying.

    Actual shit.

    From my asshole.

    It wasn’t a goblin.

    It was diarrhea.

    😩

    My stomach hurt.

    I was nauseous.

    I was sweating.

    I didn’t know which end was going to betray me next.

    I sat on that toilet for about an hour.

    I never puked.

    But I was prepared for war.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of this, I had another horrifying realization.

    Imagine if that bed hadn’t let me go.

    Imagine being stuck by my belly ring while I shit all over myself.

    The blankets.

    The bed.

    MY SLEEPING BOYFRIEND.

    No.

    Absolutely not.

    There is no recovering from that.

    I would have had to break up with him.

    Move.

    Change my name.

    Start an entirely new life.

    😭☠️

    I called my mom—

    YES, I KNOW.

    —and asked if she had Pepto.

    She didn’t.

    Thankfully my boyfriend was off work, so once he woke up, he went to CVS and got me some.

    I chugged it in the car.

    And then I found out my niece and both nephews had the exact same stomach symptoms.

    Cool.

    So apparently the tummy goblin was contagious.

    I called off work.

    And yes.

    I still went to the Breaking Benjamin concert that night.

    I had disposable period underwear.

    That’s basically a diaper.

    We were going to be fine.

    🤣

    By the time we left, my stomach was still upset but nowhere near as bad.

    We went to Texas Roadhouse.

    I ate very little.

    And realized I had forgotten the Pepto at home.

    Good thing I had my diaper.

    ☠️😂

    And then?

    The concert was SO GOOD.

    Kami Kehoe was better than I expected.

    Starset?

    WOW.

    They put on such a good show. They kept my attention on that stage the entire time.

    Chevelle was basically a giant blast of childhood memories I didn’t know I needed.

    And, of course—

    Breaking Benjamin.

    Worth risking the tummy goblin.

    😂

    Getting home was considerably less fun.

    It took almost half an hour just to get out of the venue.

    We got rerouted.

    Drove in circles.

    And at one point my boyfriend turned into the wrong lane while another car was coming toward us.

    It barely missed us.

    That part was terrifying.

    Once we finally got onto the interstate, I could relax.

    Apparently I relaxed a little too much because I fell asleep before we got home.


    Thursday was considerably quieter.

    Thank fuck.

    My stomach still hurt, but it was more of a leftover hurt.

    No goblin.

    We spent the morning cuddled up in the living room, my boyfriend in the recliner and me on the couch, watching CaRtOoNz on YouTube.

    I stayed on that couch basically all day.

    Worked on my blog.

    Started researching my next History After Dark topic.

    Got a slight headache and tried lying down in the dark.

    Then my sister called.

    And somehow I discovered that I apparently live in an alternate universe.

    I told her:

    “I asked my boyfriend if he would take me to see Practical Magic 2, and do you know what he said?”

    “No?”

    “Nope.”

    “What’s that?”

    …

    WHAT’S THAT!?

    Practical Magic!

    🎶 You put the lime in the coconut… 🎶

    MIDNIGHT MARGARITAS!?

    NONE OF THIS!?

    She tells me she knows the song from Daddy Daycare.

    I add my best friend to the call.

    SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT PRACTICAL MAGIC IS EITHER.

    She adds one of her friends.

    HE DOESN’T KNOW.

    I add my sister’s best friend.

    Surely SHE knows.

    The movie came out in 1998.

    She’s older than me.

    SHE DIDN’T KNOW EITHER.

    WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!?

    Is this a glitch in the Matrix?

    Did I accidentally cross into another timeline?

    Am I the only person left who remembers midnight margaritas!?

    I have never felt so alone.

    😭😂


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    There were a lot of little things this week.

    People giving me rides when my car decided it no longer required a muffler.

    A friend letting me vent until I could laugh again.

    My boyfriend buying me concert tickets because he knew how badly I wanted to go.

    But one of my favorite little things happened Friday.

    I was roughhousing with my kiddo while we waited for his bus, and he turned just right and broke one of my nails basically in half.

    Now.

    I have really long nails.

    They are ALWAYS done.

    So when I say I broke it in half, I still technically had a fingernail.

    To some people?

    Normal nail.

    To me?

    THERE WAS NO NAIL.

    😭

    It was basically a nub.

    My finger hurt, and I’m getting a whole new set next week anyway, so I went to my nail tech and just had her cut it down.

    Later, I went to my sister’s house.

    Sissy saw my finger.

    She asked what happened.

    I told her.

    And that little girl decided she was going to fix it.

    She colored the nail green to match the rest.

    Then she looked at it and apparently decided:

    No.

    Too boring.

    So she added a little pink paw print.

    🥹

    And I know that sounds like such a tiny thing.

    But my nails are always done.

    They’re never just plain.

    And she noticed.

    She wanted it to match.

    Then she wanted to give it a little extra something because she knows NeeNee’s nails aren’t boring.

    She’s four.

    And she noticed.

    I love that kid.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    Oh, I have options.

    SO MANY OPTIONS.

    Friday morning, my kiddo came into work and immediately chose chaos.

    Looked at the teacher.

    Started throwing things.

    Tantrum.

    Cool.

    It’s going to be one of those days.

    Turns out?

    He was tired.

    Of course he was.

    Later, I was playing Monopoly Go on my phone.

    Yes, I was at work.

    No, I’m not supposed to be on my phone.

    It was Fun Friday, my kiddo was running around the classroom, and I knew exactly where he was and what he was doing.

    Don’t worry about me.

    😂

    He came over and touched my phone.

    “No.”

    He walked away.

    Got his speaking device.

    Came back.

    Pressed:

    “I play.”

    And looked at me.

    At first I told him, “Yes, you can go play.”

    Then I looked at him.

    He looked at me.

    …

    OH.

    You want to play MY game.

    😂

    “Okay. Come here.”

    He climbed into my lap, and we played Monopoly Go together.

    “One finger. Press here.”

    Good job.

    “Now we wait.”

    Good.

    “One finger. Press this one.”

    Good job, buddy.

    You’re doing it.

    🥹


    After work, I called my sister to see if the boys still wanted to stay the night.

    She said yes, but Pooh Boy wouldn’t be home until around 6:30, so she asked if I wanted to wait and pick them both up together.

    Fine by me.

    Then I hear Doodoo in the background:

    “NOOOOO!”

    No?

    “NOW!”

    Now?

    “Yeah!”

    Okay.

    Say less. I’m on my way.

    🤣

    I get there.

    I’m barely through the door.

    This boy comes running at me with his shoes.

    I put them on.

    He climbs up my leg.

    Looks at his mother.

    “Bye!”

    Waves.

    Blows her a kiss.

    ☠️😂

    We stayed a little longer so I could love on Sissy after she finished painting her dad’s nails.

    Then Doodoo, Mawmaw Nesi, and I went outside.

    I looked down for approximately two seconds to text my sister.

    Looked back up.

    There was RED STUFF ALL OVER DOODOO’S LEG.

    Internally:

    OH MY GOD. BLOOD.

    How are you bleeding!?

    Where are you bleeding!?

    Why is there so much!?

    I’m investigating while trying to stay calm.

    Then I notice some hanging out of his mouth around his binky.

    …

    “Doodoo, did you puke?”

    “Puke.”

    Oh.

    Cool.

    He had been drinking red juice.

    So my nephew had apparently just spontaneously vomited all over himself outside.

    That’s enough outdoor time for today.

    Bath.

    Immediately.

    😭

    Later, Pooh Boy got home.

    I checked my boyfriend’s location.

    Work.

    I asked if he could grab Pooh Boy on the way home.

    Yep.

    My sister asked how far away he was.

    I checked.

    “Twenty-five minutes.”

    She sits down on the couch.

    “Cool. I can sit for a minute.”

    KNOCK KNOCK.

    She considers not answering because she JUST sat down and isn’t expecting anyone yet.

    Maybe Pooh Boy’s grandma forgot something.

    She answers.

    Looks back at me through the phone.

    “How long before Uncle gets here?”

    “Twenty-five minutes. I just checked.”

    She turns the phone toward the door.

    “Uncle is here now.”

    …

    WHAT!?

    🤣🤣🤣

    Apparently I didn’t give Maps enough time to update his actual location.

    My bad.


    That night I went to put Pooh Boy’s pajamas on him.

    First problem:

    His entire butt cheek was hanging out of his diaper.

    How?

    Apparently his grandma had changed him before bringing him home.

    This is also the woman who once put his diaper on BACKWARDS, so…

    There’s that.

    😂

    Second problem:

    The pajamas he wore at my house LAST WEEKEND no longer fit.

    His belly was hanging out.

    The pants didn’t cover his legs.

    BRO.

    You did NOT get that big in a week.

    My sister just laughed and said she’d send more pajamas for my house next weekend.

    They were both asleep by eight.

    We LOVE an easy bedtime.

    Then around two in the morning:

    DONK.

    Followed immediately by Pooh Boy screaming bloody murder.

    I flew out of bed.

    Checked his head.

    No blood.

    No bumps.

    No obvious injury.

    Apparently he had managed to headbutt the wall.

    I cuddled him.

    Calmed him down.

    Put him back to bed.

    Crisis over.

    For that night.

    Because Saturday night?

    Saturday night that child declared war on sleep.

    He didn’t go down easily to begin with.

    He was yelling and playing until ten.

    Then at ONE IN THE MORNING, he woke up.

    And from one until after four, it was:

    Up.

    Down.

    Spin.

    Spin.

    Spin.

    Yell.

    Giggle.

    Throw things.

    Smack the bed.

    Run around the pack-n-play.

    Headbutt the wall.

    Scream.

    Giggle some more.

    Climb underneath the pillows.

    Climb underneath the blankets.

    Climb underneath the MAT in the pack-n-play.

    Reach over and try to pull the blanket off of us.

    FROM ONE UNTIL AFTER FOUR IN THE FUCKING MORNING.

    I finally started dozing around four because he had managed to stay quiet for longer than three minutes.

    I could still hear him moving.

    Still giggling.

    I have no idea what time he actually went back to sleep.

    Do you know what time he woke up?

    EIGHT.

    WHY!?

    😩😩😩


    Meanwhile, Doodoo had been super clingy Saturday.

    He’d puked Friday.

    He slept for hours Saturday morning.

    And the rest of the day, he basically wanted to become part of my body.

    Arms around me.

    Legs around me.

    Holding on for dear life.

    If I put him down?

    Throw himself backward.

    Stomp.

    Run straight back at me.

    Cling again.

    Cry.

    Okay.

    Okay.

    Come here.

    🥲

    So we spent most of Saturday cuddled in the recliner watching Jurassic World.

    My best friend who moved out of state was also back for the weekend because she finally got an apartment and came with a U-Haul to get the rest of her things.

    Naturally, being the wonderful best friend she is, she came to visit me.

    Well…

    “Visit me” might be generous.

    🤣

    She’s gained a little weight, so we spent approximately an hour playing dress-up in my dresses.

    She LOVES my dresses, but most of them have always been too big on her.

    Because I have huge-ass boobs.

    And hers are basically nonexistent.

    Yes, I know you read these posts. Hi. Love you. 🤣

    But now she can fit some of them, so she finally got to try on a bunch she’s been wanting to wear.

    And every single time she came out in another dress, Doodoo was sitting there going:

    “BlahBlah! That’s pretty!”

    😭😂

    Maybe this is where it starts.

    Women spend their childhoods watching other women try on dresses while everyone around them goes:

    “Ooooooh! That’s so pretty!”

    Then adulthood arrives and we’re fully trained.

    Friend comes out of dressing room.

    Automatic response:

    “THAT’S SO PRETTY.”

    Doodoo is simply getting an early education.


    Sunday morning, after approximately seventeen minutes of sleep—

    Okay.

    Slight exaggeration.

    But that’s what it felt like.

    I got up with Pooh Boy and went to the bathroom.

    I had to poop.

    He decided I was not allowed to do that alone.

    Fine.

    Whatever.

    At least I was the only one awake.

    While I’m sitting there, I hear the bed moving.

    Then little feet running across the floor.

    Bedroom door opens.

    More little feet.

    I open the bathroom door.

    Doodoo comes running in.

    Stops.

    Smiles.

    “Hi!”

    “Were you a big boy?”

    “Yeah!”

    “Did you wake up, get off the bed, and come find me all by yourself?”

    “Yeah!”

    He spends the rest of my bathroom trip hugging and lying on my leg.

    Awh.

    My big boy.

    🥹

    We come out.

    Uncle is sitting in the recliner.

    “Uncle! Doodoo said he was a big boy and did all of that by himself this morning!”

    My boyfriend looks at me.

    “That little motherfucker lied!”

    ☠️☠️☠️

    Apparently Doodoo had woken him up by karate chopping him in the throat and yelling:

    “UNCLE!”

    Then:

    “UP!”

    My boyfriend got him out of bed.

    So the only thing this child actually accomplished independently that morning was assaulting his uncle.

    🤣🤣🤣

    Sir.

    Why did you lie directly to my face?


    Later, I took Doodoo home.

    Sissy was having a VERY difficult time listening to her mom.

    Like…

    at all.

    So I talked to her about listening and told her that if she couldn’t listen to her mom, I was taking all of the princess stuff she got that day home with me.

    She could earn it back.

    She apologized to her mom.

    And then immediately went back to not listening.

    🫠

    Okay.

    “Get your shoes on. You’re going home with me.”

    TEARS.

    Suddenly we remembered how listening works.

    😂

    She apologized again.

    I gave her one more chance.

    She was still listening when I left, so she didn’t have to come home with me.

    Princess privileges maintained.


    I finally got home.

    And my boyfriend was sitting in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by all of our clothes.

    Great.

    Laundry.

    I was going to shower first.

    Apparently not.

    😂

    We finished the laundry.

    I showered.

    He went to play PalWorld with his best friend.

    And I went into the bedroom.

    Then I sent him a text:

    “I know you’re gaming, but do you want to come see if I participated in No Shave September? lol”

    Y’all.

    That man came running into that bedroom so fucking fast.

    🤣🤣🤣

    I knew exactly what I was doing.

    🥵


    And now it’s Sunday evening.

    The kids are home.

    The laundry is done.

    I’m showered.

    My boyfriend is playing PalWorld with his friend.

    And I’m on the couch.

    Not moving.

    Not answering any summons.

    Not fixing anything.

    Not crawling underneath a car.

    And hopefully not being attacked by any more stomach goblins.

    😂

    I’m tired.

    Very tired.

    But it was a good week.

    Not an easy one.

    Definitely not a quiet one.

    But a good one.

    There were concerts and cuddles and dinosaurs and people who showed up when I needed them.

    There were also bodily fluids, broken car parts, a broken nail, approximately three hours of sleep, and a shocking number of incidents involving somebody’s throat.

    Balance.

    😂

    And right now?

    The couch is comfortable.

    Everybody is where they’re supposed to be.

    I have nowhere else I need to go.

    I’ll take it.

    Until next time,
    —Destiny

    P.S. What was the most completely unhinged thing that happened in your week? Because I feel like I’ve set the bar pretty high this time. 😂

    Some weeks make absolutely no sense while you’re living them.

    You just keep moving from one thing to the next, wondering what the hell could possibly happen now.

    And then Sunday gets here.

    You look back at everything that happened over the last seven days and realize…

    Oh.

    Apparently the answer was a lot.

    😂

    This week had some really good moments.

    Some really shitty ones.

    A few that were both.

    And several that I’m pretty sure could only happen to me.

    But somewhere in the middle of all of it, I kept finding these little moments that made everything else feel a little less heavy.

    A kid who’s getting way too big crawling into my lap like he still fits there perfectly.

    A friend who knew when I needed somebody to listen instead of give advice.

    A four-year-old noticing that one of my nails didn’t match and deciding she needed to fix it for me.

    Nothing huge.

    Just little things.

    And apparently those are the things I carried with me the most this week.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    Monday, my kiddo at work crawled into my lap while I was sitting in the rocker.

    My immediate thought was:

    Awh! He wants cuddles! Sweet boy!

    Nope.

    Well…

    Kind of.

    He wrapped his hand around my throat—

    and fell asleep.

    🥲😂

    Literally put himself to sleep.

    This boy has not taken a nap at school in almost a year, aside from the occasional one when he’s sick.

    I don’t know if he missed me that much while I was gone.

    I don’t know if he was just exhausted.

    Maybe both.

    But he slept in my lap for about 45 minutes while I rocked him.

    I moved his hand from my throat because, you know…

    breathing.

    But other than that?

    I didn’t move him.

    My arm fell asleep.

    My legs fell asleep.

    I stayed exactly where I was.

    When he finally woke up, he started giggling, nuzzled into me, and stayed there for another half hour.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I realized something.

    He’s gotten so big.

    Like…

    when the hell did that happen?

    I remember when holding him was easy.

    Picking him up was easy.

    Carrying him around was easy.

    Now this child is almost my height.

    Granted, I’m literally five feet tall and most fifth graders are probably going to tower over me soon, but STILL.

    😂

    He isn’t the little baby I originally started working with anymore.

    He’s growing up.

    Fast.

    And nobody really warns you about that part.

    Did I slowly watch him grow and somehow not notice?

    Did he hit some massive growth spurt while I was recovering from surgery?

    When exactly did this happen?

    I have questions.

    And I think the universe owes me some answers.


    Of course, the universe responded by making my muffler fall off my car as I was leaving work.

    ☠️

    Because apparently we couldn’t just have a sweet Monday.

    My friend from maintenance came and helped me tie it up well enough to get home, and I parked the car there for the night because my boyfriend worked late and I was NOT about to have that man crawling underneath my car at ten o’clock at night.

    Then came the game of:

    How the fuck am I getting to work tomorrow?

    Mom could take me, but I’d be two and a half hours late.

    My sister’s best friend couldn’t.

    Eventually, one of my coworkers texted me around ten that night and said he could pick me up.

    Problem solved.

    For approximately eight hours.

    Because then Tuesday happened.


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    Tuesday morning started with my mom.

    I called to tell her I didn’t need the ride to work anymore.

    She huffed.

    “Okay.”

    And hung up.

    Welllllll…

    OKKKKAAAAYYYYY then.

    I called her back because I still needed a ride home, and she literally has to pass my house anyway.

    She huffed again.

    “Okay.”

    I asked what was wrong.

    And suddenly we were having an entire argument about me being a bad daughter, having an attitude, yelling at her…

    Meanwhile, my boyfriend was in the bathroom with the door closed and could hear every word she was yelling through the phone I was holding to my ear.

    Then she hung up on me.

    So I called her back.

    And apparently Tuesday’s theme became:

    MATCHING ENERGY.

    I told her if she wanted to be a rude ass bitch to me that morning, she didn’t have to worry about giving me a ride.

    I didn’t need her.

    Just because she’s my mom doesn’t mean she has to be part of my life.

    She started to say something.

    I told her I didn’t give a fuck what she had to say anymore.

    And I hung up.

    Yay me.

    🙃

    So naturally, I called my best friend to vent.

    “I don’t know what to tell you. I told you so.”

    …

    Ma’am.

    I did not call for an I-told-you-so.

    Click.

    😂

    She texted me afterward.

    I opened the messages.

    Didn’t read them.

    I had reached my quota.

    Then another friend called me.

    The first thing she said was:

    “Your mom?”

    YES.

    MY MOM.

    😂

    “What happened?”

    And I told her.

    She didn’t tell me what I should have done.

    She didn’t give me an “I told you so.”

    She just listened.

    By the end of the conversation, she had me smiling and giggling.

    And I was okay again.

    That stayed with me.

    Sometimes you don’t need somebody to solve anything.

    Sometimes you don’t even need advice.

    Sometimes you just need somebody to let you be pissed off for a minute.


    Unfortunately, the universe was not finished with Tuesday.

    My doctor’s office messaged me saying my medication had been denied by insurance and that the delay was because I gave them the wrong pharmacy.

    So.

    Again.

    MATCHING ENERGY.

    I called.

    I spent about an hour on the phone trying to figure out what the hell was happening.

    The woman who answered offered to transfer me to the nurse who had sent the message.

    I specifically said:

    Absolutely not.

    I was not in the mood to give that woman a piece of my mind.

    Guess who she transferred me to?

    That exact nurse.

    “Imagine that. She transferred me to the one nurse I told her I don’t want to talk to today.”

    “Excuse me?”

    “You heard me right.”

    She tried to apologize.

    At that point, I didn’t want an apology.

    I wanted to know what the hell was happening with my shots and what my options were now.

    Then I talked to another nurse who kept interrupting me.

    “Ma’am! Please do NOT interrupt me while I’m talking to you. That’s very rude.”

    And then—

    “Okay.”

    With a huff.

    THAT FUCKING HUFFED ‘OKAY.’

    Apparently that was just the sound of Tuesday.

    😭

    Then I found out my gynecologist quit to work closer to home.

    Which…

    I completely understand.

    Good for her.

    Terrible for me.

    Because I actually liked her.

    Now I’m apparently being passed between the other four doctors at the practice, and I’m sorry, but the idea of four different gynecologists taking turns looking at my vagina does NOT sit right with me.

    At all.

    By this point, I was at work, stressed, overstimulated, playing phone tag with the doctor’s office—

    and my kiddo had decided that because I was on my phone, obviously he needed to participate.

    Trying to take my phone.

    Putting his ear against mine.

    Trying to listen.

    Trying to talk.

    Sir.

    You are nonverbal.

    This is not FaceTime.

    What are you trying to accomplish here?

    😭😂

    I was DONE.

    And then my boyfriend texted me.

    I opened it.

    And immediately started crying.

    Happy tears this time.

    He bought me two tickets to see The Pretty Reckless.

    MY FAVORITE BAND.

    I had already accepted that I was probably going to miss them because my first paycheck since surgery comes the day after the concert.

    I’d been upset about it all month.

    And on one of the shittiest mornings I’d had in a while, that man bought the tickets.

    My entire fucking day changed.

    I can die happy now.

    Well.

    After the concert.

    Obviously.

    😂

    And if I don’t?

    That man might be getting an engagement ring for Christmas because apparently I have decided I’m marrying him ASAP.

    The rest of Tuesday?

    Completely different day.

    My kiddo was on his best behavior.

    No more drama at work.

    I gave him a free day, and we had fun.

    My sister’s best friend picked me up.

    I went home.

    Showered.

    Picked out my outfit for Breaking Benjamin AND my outfit for The Pretty Reckless.

    And then Sissy called me.

    We stayed on the phone for an hour and a half.

    We barely talked.

    Every once in a while, one of us would say:

    “I love you.”

    And then we’d go right back to whatever we were doing.

    😂

    She’s four.

    Apparently we have already reached the stage of our relationship where neither of us needs to actually contribute anything to the phone call.

    We just need to know the other one is still there.

    And honestly?

    I kind of love that.

    My boyfriend eventually got home, and we spent the next hour and a half underneath my car trying to pull the muffler up enough for me to drive.

    I had to take a second shower because I was covered in dirt.

    By 9:40, I was finally ready to eat dinner and take my ass to bed.

    For a crappy-ass morning?

    It ended pretty nicely.


    📷 Through My Lens

    Wednesday morning began with one of the most horrifying situations I have ever found myself in.

    You are not ready for this story.

    I slept naked Tuesday night.

    And when I say naked, I mean—

    booty-ass fucking naked.

    We did the deed.

    I rolled over.

    Passed the fuck out.

    Fantastic ending to the night.

    Then my alarm went off Wednesday morning.

    I snoozed it.

    And slowly…

    my stomach started rumbling.

    Not hunger.

    No.

    This was a goblin.

    Something inside of me was trying to escape.

    I tried to get out of bed.

    I COULDN’T.

    My belly ring was attached to the bed.

    I’m lying on my stomach.

    Ass in the air.

    Completely naked.

    A gastrointestinal demon is rapidly approaching the exit.

    And I am physically tethered to my fucking bed by my belly button.

    😭😭😭

    I’m squeezing muscles I didn’t know I had.

    Fighting the bed.

    Trying to determine whether ripping my belly ring out would be preferable to what was about to happen.

    And finally—

    THE BED RELEASED ME.

    I ran to the bathroom naked.

    Sat down.

    And…

    shit started flying.

    Actual shit.

    From my asshole.

    It wasn’t a goblin.

    It was diarrhea.

    😩

    My stomach hurt.

    I was nauseous.

    I was sweating.

    I didn’t know which end was going to betray me next.

    I sat on that toilet for about an hour.

    I never puked.

    But I was prepared for war.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of this, I had another horrifying realization.

    Imagine if that bed hadn’t let me go.

    Imagine being stuck by my belly ring while I shit all over myself.

    The blankets.

    The bed.

    MY SLEEPING BOYFRIEND.

    No.

    Absolutely not.

    There is no recovering from that.

    I would have had to break up with him.

    Move.

    Change my name.

    Start an entirely new life.

    😭☠️

    I called my mom—

    YES, I KNOW.

    —and asked if she had Pepto.

    She didn’t.

    Thankfully my boyfriend was off work, so once he woke up, he went to CVS and got me some.

    I chugged it in the car.

    And then I found out my niece and both nephews had the exact same stomach symptoms.

    Cool.

    So apparently the tummy goblin was contagious.

    I called off work.

    And yes.

    I still went to the Breaking Benjamin concert that night.

    I had disposable period underwear.

    That’s basically a diaper.

    We were going to be fine.

    🤣

    By the time we left, my stomach was still upset but nowhere near as bad.

    We went to Texas Roadhouse.

    I ate very little.

    And realized I had forgotten the Pepto at home.

    Good thing I had my diaper.

    ☠️😂

    And then?

    The concert was SO GOOD.

    Kami Kehoe was better than I expected.

    Starset?

    WOW.

    They put on such a good show. They kept my attention on that stage the entire time.

    Chevelle was basically a giant blast of childhood memories I didn’t know I needed.

    And, of course—

    Breaking Benjamin.

    Worth risking the tummy goblin.

    😂

    Getting home was considerably less fun.

    It took almost half an hour just to get out of the venue.

    We got rerouted.

    Drove in circles.

    And at one point my boyfriend turned into the wrong lane while another car was coming toward us.

    It barely missed us.

    That part was terrifying.

    Once we finally got onto the interstate, I could relax.

    Apparently I relaxed a little too much because I fell asleep before we got home.


    Thursday was considerably quieter.

    Thank fuck.

    My stomach still hurt, but it was more of a leftover hurt.

    No goblin.

    We spent the morning cuddled up in the living room, my boyfriend in the recliner and me on the couch, watching CaRtOoNz on YouTube.

    I stayed on that couch basically all day.

    Worked on my blog.

    Started researching my next History After Dark topic.

    Got a slight headache and tried lying down in the dark.

    Then my sister called.

    And somehow I discovered that I apparently live in an alternate universe.

    I told her:

    “I asked my boyfriend if he would take me to see Practical Magic 2, and do you know what he said?”

    “No?”

    “Nope.”

    “What’s that?”

    …

    WHAT’S THAT!?

    Practical Magic!

    🎶 You put the lime in the coconut… 🎶

    MIDNIGHT MARGARITAS!?

    NONE OF THIS!?

    She tells me she knows the song from Daddy Daycare.

    I add my best friend to the call.

    SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT PRACTICAL MAGIC IS EITHER.

    She adds one of her friends.

    HE DOESN’T KNOW.

    I add my sister’s best friend.

    Surely SHE knows.

    The movie came out in 1998.

    She’s older than me.

    SHE DIDN’T KNOW EITHER.

    WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!?

    Is this a glitch in the Matrix?

    Did I accidentally cross into another timeline?

    Am I the only person left who remembers midnight margaritas!?

    I have never felt so alone.

    😭😂


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    There were a lot of little things this week.

    People giving me rides when my car decided it no longer required a muffler.

    A friend letting me vent until I could laugh again.

    My boyfriend buying me concert tickets because he knew how badly I wanted to go.

    But one of my favorite little things happened Friday.

    I was roughhousing with my kiddo while we waited for his bus, and he turned just right and broke one of my nails basically in half.

    Now.

    I have really long nails.

    They are ALWAYS done.

    So when I say I broke it in half, I still technically had a fingernail.

    To some people?

    Normal nail.

    To me?

    THERE WAS NO NAIL.

    😭

    It was basically a nub.

    My finger hurt, and I’m getting a whole new set next week anyway, so I went to my nail tech and just had her cut it down.

    Later, I went to my sister’s house.

    Sissy saw my finger.

    She asked what happened.

    I told her.

    And that little girl decided she was going to fix it.

    She colored the nail green to match the rest.

    Then she looked at it and apparently decided:

    No.

    Too boring.

    So she added a little pink paw print.

    🥹

    And I know that sounds like such a tiny thing.

    But my nails are always done.

    They’re never just plain.

    And she noticed.

    She wanted it to match.

    Then she wanted to give it a little extra something because she knows NeeNee’s nails aren’t boring.

    She’s four.

    And she noticed.

    I love that kid.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    Oh, I have options.

    SO MANY OPTIONS.

    Friday morning, my kiddo came into work and immediately chose chaos.

    Looked at the teacher.

    Started throwing things.

    Tantrum.

    Cool.

    It’s going to be one of those days.

    Turns out?

    He was tired.

    Of course he was.

    Later, I was playing Monopoly Go on my phone.

    Yes, I was at work.

    No, I’m not supposed to be on my phone.

    It was Fun Friday, my kiddo was running around the classroom, and I knew exactly where he was and what he was doing.

    Don’t worry about me.

    😂

    He came over and touched my phone.

    “No.”

    He walked away.

    Got his speaking device.

    Came back.

    Pressed:

    “I play.”

    And looked at me.

    At first I told him, “Yes, you can go play.”

    Then I looked at him.

    He looked at me.

    …

    OH.

    You want to play MY game.

    😂

    “Okay. Come here.”

    He climbed into my lap, and we played Monopoly Go together.

    “One finger. Press here.”

    Good job.

    “Now we wait.”

    Good.

    “One finger. Press this one.”

    Good job, buddy.

    You’re doing it.

    🥹


    After work, I called my sister to see if the boys still wanted to stay the night.

    She said yes, but Pooh Boy wouldn’t be home until around 6:30, so she asked if I wanted to wait and pick them both up together.

    Fine by me.

    Then I hear Doodoo in the background:

    “NOOOOO!”

    No?

    “NOW!”

    Now?

    “Yeah!”

    Okay.

    Say less. I’m on my way.

    🤣

    I get there.

    I’m barely through the door.

    This boy comes running at me with his shoes.

    I put them on.

    He climbs up my leg.

    Looks at his mother.

    “Bye!”

    Waves.

    Blows her a kiss.

    ☠️😂

    We stayed a little longer so I could love on Sissy after she finished painting her dad’s nails.

    Then Doodoo, Mawmaw Nesi, and I went outside.

    I looked down for approximately two seconds to text my sister.

    Looked back up.

    There was RED STUFF ALL OVER DOODOO’S LEG.

    Internally:

    OH MY GOD. BLOOD.

    How are you bleeding!?

    Where are you bleeding!?

    Why is there so much!?

    I’m investigating while trying to stay calm.

    Then I notice some hanging out of his mouth around his binky.

    …

    “Doodoo, did you puke?”

    “Puke.”

    Oh.

    Cool.

    He had been drinking red juice.

    So my nephew had apparently just spontaneously vomited all over himself outside.

    That’s enough outdoor time for today.

    Bath.

    Immediately.

    😭

    Later, Pooh Boy got home.

    I checked my boyfriend’s location.

    Work.

    I asked if he could grab Pooh Boy on the way home.

    Yep.

    My sister asked how far away he was.

    I checked.

    “Twenty-five minutes.”

    She sits down on the couch.

    “Cool. I can sit for a minute.”

    KNOCK KNOCK.

    She considers not answering because she JUST sat down and isn’t expecting anyone yet.

    Maybe Pooh Boy’s grandma forgot something.

    She answers.

    Looks back at me through the phone.

    “How long before Uncle gets here?”

    “Twenty-five minutes. I just checked.”

    She turns the phone toward the door.

    “Uncle is here now.”

    …

    WHAT!?

    🤣🤣🤣

    Apparently I didn’t give Maps enough time to update his actual location.

    My bad.


    That night I went to put Pooh Boy’s pajamas on him.

    First problem:

    His entire butt cheek was hanging out of his diaper.

    How?

    Apparently his grandma had changed him before bringing him home.

    This is also the woman who once put his diaper on BACKWARDS, so…

    There’s that.

    😂

    Second problem:

    The pajamas he wore at my house LAST WEEKEND no longer fit.

    His belly was hanging out.

    The pants didn’t cover his legs.

    BRO.

    You did NOT get that big in a week.

    My sister just laughed and said she’d send more pajamas for my house next weekend.

    They were both asleep by eight.

    We LOVE an easy bedtime.

    Then around two in the morning:

    DONK.

    Followed immediately by Pooh Boy screaming bloody murder.

    I flew out of bed.

    Checked his head.

    No blood.

    No bumps.

    No obvious injury.

    Apparently he had managed to headbutt the wall.

    I cuddled him.

    Calmed him down.

    Put him back to bed.

    Crisis over.

    For that night.

    Because Saturday night?

    Saturday night that child declared war on sleep.

    He didn’t go down easily to begin with.

    He was yelling and playing until ten.

    Then at ONE IN THE MORNING, he woke up.

    And from one until after four, it was:

    Up.

    Down.

    Spin.

    Spin.

    Spin.

    Yell.

    Giggle.

    Throw things.

    Smack the bed.

    Run around the pack-n-play.

    Headbutt the wall.

    Scream.

    Giggle some more.

    Climb underneath the pillows.

    Climb underneath the blankets.

    Climb underneath the MAT in the pack-n-play.

    Reach over and try to pull the blanket off of us.

    FROM ONE UNTIL AFTER FOUR IN THE FUCKING MORNING.

    I finally started dozing around four because he had managed to stay quiet for longer than three minutes.

    I could still hear him moving.

    Still giggling.

    I have no idea what time he actually went back to sleep.

    Do you know what time he woke up?

    EIGHT.

    WHY!?

    😩😩😩


    Meanwhile, Doodoo had been super clingy Saturday.

    He’d puked Friday.

    He slept for hours Saturday morning.

    And the rest of the day, he basically wanted to become part of my body.

    Arms around me.

    Legs around me.

    Holding on for dear life.

    If I put him down?

    Throw himself backward.

    Stomp.

    Run straight back at me.

    Cling again.

    Cry.

    Okay.

    Okay.

    Come here.

    🥲

    So we spent most of Saturday cuddled in the recliner watching Jurassic World.

    My best friend who moved out of state was also back for the weekend because she finally got an apartment and came with a U-Haul to get the rest of her things.

    Naturally, being the wonderful best friend she is, she came to visit me.

    Well…

    “Visit me” might be generous.

    🤣

    She’s gained a little weight, so we spent approximately an hour playing dress-up in my dresses.

    She LOVES my dresses, but most of them have always been too big on her.

    Because I have huge-ass boobs.

    And hers are basically nonexistent.

    Yes, I know you read these posts. Hi. Love you. 🤣

    But now she can fit some of them, so she finally got to try on a bunch she’s been wanting to wear.

    And every single time she came out in another dress, Doodoo was sitting there going:

    “BlahBlah! That’s pretty!”

    😭😂

    Maybe this is where it starts.

    Women spend their childhoods watching other women try on dresses while everyone around them goes:

    “Ooooooh! That’s so pretty!”

    Then adulthood arrives and we’re fully trained.

    Friend comes out of dressing room.

    Automatic response:

    “THAT’S SO PRETTY.”

    Doodoo is simply getting an early education.


    Sunday morning, after approximately seventeen minutes of sleep—

    Okay.

    Slight exaggeration.

    But that’s what it felt like.

    I got up with Pooh Boy and went to the bathroom.

    I had to poop.

    He decided I was not allowed to do that alone.

    Fine.

    Whatever.

    At least I was the only one awake.

    While I’m sitting there, I hear the bed moving.

    Then little feet running across the floor.

    Bedroom door opens.

    More little feet.

    I open the bathroom door.

    Doodoo comes running in.

    Stops.

    Smiles.

    “Hi!”

    “Were you a big boy?”

    “Yeah!”

    “Did you wake up, get off the bed, and come find me all by yourself?”

    “Yeah!”

    He spends the rest of my bathroom trip hugging and lying on my leg.

    Awh.

    My big boy.

    🥹

    We come out.

    Uncle is sitting in the recliner.

    “Uncle! Doodoo said he was a big boy and did all of that by himself this morning!”

    My boyfriend looks at me.

    “That little motherfucker lied!”

    ☠️☠️☠️

    Apparently Doodoo had woken him up by karate chopping him in the throat and yelling:

    “UNCLE!”

    Then:

    “UP!”

    My boyfriend got him out of bed.

    So the only thing this child actually accomplished independently that morning was assaulting his uncle.

    🤣🤣🤣

    Sir.

    Why did you lie directly to my face?


    Later, I took Doodoo home.

    Sissy was having a VERY difficult time listening to her mom.

    Like…

    at all.

    So I talked to her about listening and told her that if she couldn’t listen to her mom, I was taking all of the princess stuff she got that day home with me.

    She could earn it back.

    She apologized to her mom.

    And then immediately went back to not listening.

    🫠

    Okay.

    “Get your shoes on. You’re going home with me.”

    TEARS.

    Suddenly we remembered how listening works.

    😂

    She apologized again.

    I gave her one more chance.

    She was still listening when I left, so she didn’t have to come home with me.

    Princess privileges maintained.


    I finally got home.

    And my boyfriend was sitting in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by all of our clothes.

    Great.

    Laundry.

    I was going to shower first.

    Apparently not.

    😂

    We finished the laundry.

    I showered.

    He went to play PalWorld with his best friend.

    And I went into the bedroom.

    Then I sent him a text:

    “I know you’re gaming, but do you want to come see if I participated in No Shave September? lol”

    Y’all.

    That man came running into that bedroom so fucking fast.

    🤣🤣🤣

    I knew exactly what I was doing.

    🥵


    And now it’s Sunday evening.

    The kids are home.

    The laundry is done.

    I’m showered.

    My boyfriend is playing PalWorld with his friend.

    And I’m on the couch.

    Not moving.

    Not answering any summons.

    Not fixing anything.

    Not crawling underneath a car.

    And hopefully not being attacked by any more stomach goblins.

    😂

    I’m tired.

    Very tired.

    But it was a good week.

    Not an easy one.

    Definitely not a quiet one.

    But a good one.

    There were concerts and cuddles and dinosaurs and people who showed up when I needed them.

    There were also bodily fluids, broken car parts, a broken nail, approximately three hours of sleep, and a shocking number of incidents involving somebody’s throat.

    Balance.

    😂

    And right now?

    The couch is comfortable.

    Everybody is where they’re supposed to be.

    I have nowhere else I need to go.

    I’ll take it.

    Until next time,
    —Destiny

    P.S. What was the most completely unhinged thing that happened in your week? Because I feel like I’ve set the bar pretty high this time. 😂

  • Sunday Things #9

    This week felt like my body and my life were operating on two completely different schedules.

    My body wanted heating pads, pain patches, hot baths, a recliner, and for everybody to leave me the hell alone.

    My life said:

    Cool. Anyway, you’re going back to work. The kids miss you. Your sister needs help. There are dinosaurs to watch. Somebody is going to walk UP a slide. And apparently you’re going to end the week at a spontaneous photoshoot.

    😅

    I started the week on my period, which is exhausting enough on its own, but now that I know I have both a fibroid and endometriosis, I’ve been doing what any curious person with access to Google does:

    Looking up all the weird shit my body does and going,

    Ohhhhh. So THAT’S why.

    😂

    The lower back pain.

    The constant urge to pee.

    The horrible cramping when I poop.

    The extra bleeding when I do.

    Apparently, my body has explanations for things I’ve just been suffering through for years.

    And listen—

    period poops are already the WORST.

    I do not need two separate medical conditions working together to make them worse. 😮‍💨

    Sunday was actually surprisingly good for day two of my period. I barely hurt all day, and I had even slept through the entire night before—which is WILD for me because I’m normally up and down for the first two or three nights because I’m hurting so badly.

    Then I pooped.

    And apparently that was enough to ruin everybody’s good time.

    😂

    By 4:30 Monday morning, I was hurting badly enough that I ended up taking an hour-long nap on the toilet so I could free bleed.

    Obviously.

    Nobody ever talks about how much passing period clots can fucking hurt, either.

    This period was super clotty, and whether that had anything to do with recently having surgery or not, I have no idea.

    I just know:

    boy, I was in pain.

    I finally fell back asleep around 7 and slept until 11:30.

    Thankfully, my sister had asked Mom to watch the kids that day because I really just could not.

    I remembered that the hysterectomy belt my boyfriend’s mom gave me had heating/cooling pads in it, popped those bad boys in the microwave for thirty seconds on each side, and discovered that I basically own a portable heating pad.

    Guess who’s taking that bitch to work?

    🤷🏻‍♀️😂

    Tuesday morning?

    4 AM.

    Again.

    More pain.

    More soaking in the bathtub.

    And eventually a PTO day because there was absolutely no way I was going back to work like that.

    At one point, I was so over the pain that I genuinely thought about asking my boyfriend if he would be okay with adopting because I just—

    cannot keep doing this.

    I’m ready for them to get this stuff taken care of.

    My periods are exhausting.

    Physically.

    Emotionally.

    All of it.

    But somewhere between all the heating pads, pain patches, baths, and me refusing to leave the recliner unless absolutely necessary…

    the rest of my life kept happening anyway.

    And somehow, by the end of the week, there was a whole lot of good mixed in with the hurting.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    This one is easy.

    My heating pad.

    😮‍💨

    That thing and I have been in a committed relationship all week.

    Monday, it was the heating pads from the hysterectomy belt.

    Tuesday, I basically lived in the recliner with my heating pad and only got up when I absolutely needed to.

    And then Doodoo showed up.

    He was asleep when Mom brought him over, and when he came inside, he looked at me, climbed into my lap, and immediately went right back to sleep.

    I sat him on my stomach.

    And somehow?

    His weight actually helped.

    So I leaned the recliner back with this sleeping baby sprawled across me and got maybe thirty or forty-five minutes where I wasn’t hurting much at all.

    I was almost asleep myself before the other two came inside.

    😂

    Apparently Doodoo is also a heating pad.

    A significantly heavier one.

    With legs.

    And opinions.

    But I’ll take what I can get.


    📷 Through My Lens

    I think my favorite part of this week happened today.

    I took Doodoo home early, came back, cleaned the living room, got myself ready, and headed to my friend’s house.

    And then we just drove around and took pictures.

    No real plan.

    Just a spontaneous photoshoot.

    She took me to 420 Road, which is apparently basically a mile of road where people go to spray paint.

    I had never been there before today.

    Then we went to take pictures with planes coming in.

    😂

    And it was actually really fucking fun.

    After spending the beginning of the week barely wanting to leave my recliner, ending it out driving around, finding weird places, and taking pictures felt good.

    I love photography.

    I love finding interesting things to photograph.

    And apparently I also love standing around waiting for airplanes to fly over me.

    Who knew?

    😂


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    I don’t think you always realize how much you’re part of somebody else’s routine until you disappear from it for a while.

    Wednesday was finally my first day back at work.

    And all morning I heard:

    “Welcome back.”

    “Where have you been?”

    “I thought you weren’t working here anymore.”

    “Are you okay now?”

    “What happened?”

    “You’ve been missed.”

    I didn’t tell everybody where I was going before I left.

    Honestly, I only really talk to maybe five people there anyway. The people who mattered knew I had surgery and knew I was going to be gone for a month.

    I wasn’t about to make some giant announcement or walk around campus telling everybody individually.

    😂

    But apparently people noticed.

    And then I got on my kiddo’s bus.

    He stood up.

    Looked at me.

    Looked at the bus monitor.

    Looked back at me.

    And just—

    smiled.

    This huge smile.

    🤣

    He genuinely looked flabbergasted for a second.

    Like his brain needed a minute to process:

    Wait.

    She’s back?!

    Then he finally remembered he was supposed to grab his bag and get off the bus.

    He spent the rest of the day running back over to me for hugs and back scratches.

    Although I’m pretty sure he missed my nails more than he actually missed me.

    😂

    And apparently he wasn’t the only one.

    Wednesday evening, Sissy and Doodoo called wanting apples.

    So obviously I grabbed my last three apples, a Fudge Round, and a Nutty Bar and went over there.

    We played.

    Had a little dance party.

    Snuggled.

    And at one point I had a kid on each hip while another one tried climbing up my leg, slipped on my pajama pants, and pulled my pants down with him.

    ☠️🤣

    My sister had to pull them back up for me.

    When I left, Pooh Boy threw a tantrum because he wanted to stay the night.

    Then Thursday morning my sister told me he’d been up crying because he wanted to stay with me.

    😭

    And Thursday night, after Doodoo and Pooh Boy spent the evening at my house, Mom took them home.

    I was still on the phone with my sister when they pulled up, and Doodoo was crying.

    He had been perfectly fine when he left my house, so I asked what happened.

    My sister opened his door.

    And there he was, crying:

    “Blah Blah!”

    🥲

    Baby.

    I told him I had to work the next day, but I could come get him afterward and he could stay with me all weekend.

    He stopped crying and said okay.

    My babies.

    😭

    It breaks my whole soul when they cry because they want to stay with me and I can’t keep them.

    But between them and my kiddo at work this week, I realized something:

    being missed is a really strange kind of love.

    You aren’t there to see the moment somebody notices you’re gone.

    You just come back and find the space they were holding for you.


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    This week, I’m grateful that I got to come back.

    Back to work.

    Back to my kiddo.

    Back to some kind of normal routine.

    Even if my body isn’t completely caught up yet.

    Wednesday made that VERY clear.

    My hips and sides were killing me. I only made it two laps around the track before I needed to sit down.

    I don’t know how much of it was from being off my feet for so long, how much was from surgery and still healing, or how much my period was contributing.

    But my body definitely needs some time to get used to being back.

    Thursday, my lower back was in knots badly enough that Mom had to bring me a pain patch at work.

    I didn’t transition my kiddo nearly as much as I probably should have because I was hurting, and he was not thrilled about that.

    Which I understand.

    His routine changed because I couldn’t do what I normally do.

    And meanwhile, Wednesday he had thrown his only tantrum of the day because I told him to take a break from working and go play.

    🤣

    Apparently I returned to a tiny workaholic.

    But despite the pain and despite realizing that getting back to normal might take a little longer than I wanted—

    I got to go back.

    And overall?

    My first day back was really good.

    I’m grateful for that.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    I had options this week.

    So many options.

    Doodoo had a pull-up situation that very much justified why we call him Doodoo, while repeatedly announcing:

    “I SHIT!”

    Yes, sir.

    Yes, you did.

    And you stink.

    🤣

    Then there was Doodoo trying to manipulate Mawmaw Nesi into letting him go back outside after I already told him no.

    Me: “You trying to get Mawmaw in trouble?”

    Doodoo:

    “Yeah!”

    At least he’s honest.

    😂

    There was Pooh Boy climbing out of the bathtub by himself.

    There was my vacuum still sounding like a motorcycle until I finally got down on the floor and changed the brush.

    There was my sister dropping her vape into the bathtub.

    There was the return of the Medusa doorbell—which, apparently, I have now learned to weaponize against children.

    “Line up or I’ll push the button!”

    Everybody lined up.

    Somebody started crying in the car?

    I held up Medusa.

    Silence.

    ☠️🤣

    Last week that damn thing scared the absolute shit out of me.

    This week?

    I’m considering buying one.

    Character development.

    🤣

    But none of those win.

    Because Pooh Boy—

    my sweet little Pooh Boy—

    has apparently decided that walking normally is beneath him.

    Thursday, he was outside playing with the Frozen ride-on toy. Mawmaw Nesi had tied a rope around it because the boys can’t figure out how to scoot that particular one across the grass.

    Pooh Boy somehow got the rope wrapped around both arms and one leg.

    He wasn’t hurt.

    He wasn’t in danger.

    He was just tired, frustrated, and apparently convinced that the appropriate response was to roll around in the grass screaming.

    I kept telling him:

    “Pooh Boy, come here and I’ll help you.”

    He’d look at me.

    Reach toward me.

    Cry.

    And then—

    GO BACK TO ROLLING AROUND.

    ☠️

    Eventually, he got unstuck and went back to playing.

    Cool.

    Crisis over.

    I looked down at my phone for approximately two seconds to read a text from my sister.

    I looked back up.

    Mawmaw Nesi was running toward the slide.

    And Pooh Boy was standing—

    STANDING—

    at the top of it.

    Laughing his little ass off.

    He didn’t climb the ladder.

    Mawmaw Nesi watched him.

    HE WALKED STRAIGHT UP THE SLIDE.

    All the way.

    Without falling.

    Sir.

    You cannot take TWO STEPS across solid ground without randomly falling over.

    But you can apparently scale playground equipment like a fucking mountain goat?!

    IN TWO SECONDS?!

    ☠️☠️☠️

    I don’t understand him.

    I have stopped trying.


    And now it’s Sunday night.

    The boys stayed with us this weekend.

    There were a LOT of dinosaurs.

    Doodoo and I watched every Jurassic Park/Jurassic World movie Hulu had on Saturday because that baby loves his dinosaurs. 😂

    My sister touched up my hair.

    The boys got to stay up a little late.

    We all slept until nine this morning.

    Doodoo and I got one more dinosaur cuddle in before I took him home.

    Then I spent the afternoon with my friend taking pictures.

    And naturally, as soon as I got home, my sister called because she needed me to take her to get a new vape after dropping hers in the bathtub.

    😂

    She did get me one of those real-fruit TikTok ice creams, though.

    The mango one.

    And omggggg.

    DELICIOUS.

    Unfortunately, cold things trigger my asthma, so now I’m fighting an asthma attack because apparently even eating ice cream has to come with consequences.

    ☠️

    Stupid body.

    Stupid cold things.

    Stupid asthma.

    And now it’s after seven.

    Dinner still needs to be cooked.

    I’m exhausted.

    And I have work tomorrow.

    But compared with how this week started?

    I’ll take it.

    I started the week curled up in pain, wondering how much longer I can keep doing this.

    I’m ending it with freshly touched-up hair, a camera full of pictures, a weekend full of dinosaurs and babies, and the knowledge that apparently Medusa can control an entire group of children faster than any adult in this family.

    😂

    Not a bad ending.

    Now somebody please cook dinner for me.

    Until next time,

    —Destiny

    P.S. What’s one completely ordinary thing from your week that ended up meaning more to you than you expected?

  • 🕷️ Learning to Look Closer #9 — I Looked. I Regret It.

    Usually, Learning to Look Closer is about noticing the things we might otherwise miss.

    The light coming through the trees.

    The colors hiding in a sunset.

    The tiny details we walk past every day because we’re too busy looking somewhere else.

    It’s supposed to be about slowing down.

    Paying attention.

    Finding something beautiful in the ordinary.

    Well.

    I looked closer.

    I would like to formally withdraw my previous advice. 😂

    I’ve been sick all week.

    And somewhere between laying in bed, watching entirely too much television, and feeling like my head was approximately 97% congestion, I decided it would be a good idea to go through all of my clothes.

    Because apparently being sick wasn’t enough suffering.

    So there I was.

    Surrounded by clothes.

    Completely out of energy.

    Ready to give up on the entire project and crawl back into bed.

    And then I looked up.

    There he was.

    A spider.

    Just chilling above my bedroom door.

    In my bedroom.

    Rent free.

    Like he had somewhere to be and I was interrupting him.

    Now, there is something you should probably know about me.

    I am terrified of spiders.

    Not uncomfortable.

    Not “Ew, a spider.”

    Terrified.

    And naturally, this little asshole had positioned himself somewhere I couldn’t reach him.

    So I did what any brave, capable, independent 33-year-old woman would do.

    I stared at him while trying to figure out how the hell I was going to kill him without getting close enough for him to potentially touch me.

    There was just one problem.

    I looked away.

    For approximately half a second.

    When I looked back—

    he was gone.

    Do you know what’s worse than seeing a spider in your bedroom?

    NOT SEEING THE SPIDER YOU JUST SAW IN YOUR BEDROOM.

    Because now we have options.

    Is he behind the dresser?

    Under the bed?

    On the ceiling?

    Did he leave?

    Is he currently watching me write this?

    WHERE DID YOU GO, SIR?

    And why were you so fucking fast?! 😭

    I read something once about jumping spiders that said they tend to have their own little routines.

    They supposedly wander around the same areas doing their tiny spider business, so if you suddenly notice one somewhere you normally don’t, maybe you’re the one who stepped outside your usual routine.

    I have absolutely no idea how scientifically accurate that is.

    But I’ve been thinking about it.

    Because maybe he’s been here before.

    Maybe while I’ve been living my life, sleeping in my bed and minding my own business, this tiny creature has been living an entire little life alongside mine.

    Taking the same routes.

    Visiting the same places.

    Doing whatever the hell spiders do all day.

    And I simply never noticed him.

    Until our routines crossed.

    Which is actually kind of fascinating.

    I hate it.

    But it’s fascinating. 😂

    Maybe there’s something to that.

    There are entire little worlds existing around us all the time.

    Things happening in corners we never look toward.

    Creatures following routines we know nothing about.

    Tiny lives intersecting with ours for a few seconds before disappearing again.

    Sometimes looking closer means noticing a beautiful sunset.

    Sometimes it means noticing the way two people love each other.

    Sometimes it means finding something extraordinary hiding inside something completely ordinary.

    And sometimes—

    you look up while sorting clothes and discover that you apparently have a roommate.

    A roommate who has now disappeared somewhere inside your bedroom.

    So perhaps Learning to Look Closer needs one small amendment:

    Pay attention to the world around you.

    Notice the little things.

    Look for what you normally overlook.

    But occasionally?

    Mind your fucking business.

    Because now I know there’s a spider somewhere in my bedroom.

    And I can never unknow it.

    Until next time,

    —Destiny

    P.S. If you happen to know where my new roommate went, no you don’t. I would actually prefer to sleep tonight. 🕷️😭

  • Sunday Things #7

    Last Sunday, I ended Sunday Things by deciding that whatever needed me could become Monday’s problem.

    Apparently Monday took that personally.

    Because Monday arrived, took one look at me, and said:

    Fine.

    YOU can become Monday’s problem.

    😂

    I spent almost the entire beginning of this week sick.

    Not cute sick.

    Not curl up under a blanket with some tea and enjoy a cozy little sick day sick.

    I mean—

    can’t breathe through my nose.

    Ears blocked.

    Coughing.

    Constantly clearing my throat.

    Generally looking and feeling like something that should be quarantined from the public.

    So I did what any responsible adult would do.

    I stayed in bed and watched The Goldbergs.

    For two days.

    😮‍💨

    Monday night brought a not-so-great moment between my boyfriend and me involving NyQuil, hurt feelings, and one of those arguments where the actual problem becomes significantly larger than the thing that started it.

    We talked about it Tuesday.

    Really talked about it.

    And while conversations don’t magically erase hurt feelings, sometimes understanding each other a little better afterward is enough.

    By Wednesday, I still felt like shit.

    But my poor nose was no longer the biggest thing on my mind because my nephew was getting tubes put in his ears.

    He went back for surgery without his mom.

    And didn’t even cry.

    My poor Doodoo.

    Him so brave. 🥺

    Meanwhile, I was over here losing a fight with my own sinuses.

    So really, one of us handled the week with dignity.

    It was not me.

    By Thursday, I had apparently decided that being sick was no longer a valid excuse to avoid everything I had been putting off.

    I went through my clothes.

    Got rid of a ridiculous amount.

    Gave them to a friend who recently had a baby and needed clothes that actually fit her right now.

    Got to cuddle said adorable baby.

    Cleaned the bedroom.

    Put away most of the clothes.

    Made ribs.

    And somehow managed to feel productive while still breathing exclusively through approximately one nostril.

    Growth.

    😂

    And then Friday arrived.

    And with it—

    children.

    Of course.

    Because apparently my house remains an unlicensed daycare.

    At this point, I should probably just accept it.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    There was something weirdly comforting about television this week.

    Maybe because I spent so much time sick.

    Maybe because when you feel like shit, there is something particularly wonderful about putting on a show that asks absolutely nothing from you.

    Monday and Tuesday, it was The Goldbergs.

    Then Thursday morning, I was sitting there watching Full House.

    Baby Michelle.

    Or, as we called her when we were kids:

    Baby Michelle.

    😂

    And suddenly I remembered sitting around watching Full House before school when I was little.

    Waiting for the bus.

    It wasn’t some huge, important memory.

    Nothing particularly exciting happened in it.

    But for a second, I could almost feel what those mornings felt like.

    Then Saturday morning, I was curled up in the recliner with Doodoo watching Power Rangers Dino Charge.

    Which, by the way—

    I introduced him to it.

    And he LOVES it.

    You’re welcome, child.

    😂

    Then we watched Jurassic Park.

    And somewhere in there, the two of us fell asleep together in the recliner.

    It’s funny how comfort changes as you get older.

    Sometimes it’s watching the shows you loved when you were little.

    And sometimes it’s sitting with a little boy curled against you while you introduce him to things that might someday become part of his childhood memories.

    I like that.

    A lot.


    📸 Through My Lens

    If I could freeze one part of this week into a photograph, I think it would be Saturday evening.

    Not because anything extraordinary happened.

    Actually, quite the opposite.

    Doodoo had already spent most of the day with us.

    We had watched Power Rangers.

    Watched dinosaurs.

    Napped.

    Played outside.

    Played outside some more when Mawmaw Nesi got home.

    Then Uncle came home and apparently looked around at the situation and thought:

    You know what this house needs?

    Another boy.

    😂

    So we went and got my other nephew for the night.

    After dinner, my boyfriend gave both boys a bath while I finished eating.

    Then all five of us ended up in the living room having a dance party while we waited for 8:30 so Doodoo could have his bedtime medicine.

    Nothing fancy.

    Nothing planned.

    Just music.

    Kids dancing.

    Adults being ridiculous.

    Everybody laughing.

    Eventually both boys went to sleep without much of a fight.

    Then my boyfriend and I took turns showering, curled up together, watched an episode of Full House, and went to bed ourselves.

    It had been a long day.

    A loud day.

    An exhausting day.

    And a really fucking good one.

    If I could have photographed the feeling instead of the moment, I think it would have looked something like that.

    A messy living room.

    Two sleepy little boys.

    Music playing.

    Everybody together.

    Home.


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    I set a boundary with a friend this week.

    One I genuinely didn’t think I should have needed to say out loud.

    But apparently I did.

    So I did.

    He apologized.

    Then told me he was going to “shut up for a while.”

    And I haven’t heard from him since.

    I’m still not entirely sure how I feel about that.

    Because boundaries are weird.

    We talk about them like they’re these incredibly simple things.

    Just communicate.

    Tell people what you’re comfortable with.

    Set boundaries.

    And yes.

    Absolutely.

    But nobody really talks about what happens after you set one.

    Because sometimes you can communicate something calmly and clearly, and the other person can apologize—

    and somehow you’re still left sitting there wondering whether you just damaged the relationship by asking for something you needed.

    I don’t think setting a boundary should automatically create distance.

    And I don’t think telling someone, Hey, this made me uncomfortable, should translate into:

    Fine. Then I just won’t talk to you.

    Those are two very different things.

    Maybe he just needed a little space.

    Maybe I did, too.

    I don’t know yet.

    What I do know is that I don’t regret saying it.

    Because I think there comes a point where keeping the peace with someone else starts costing you peace with yourself.

    And I’m getting a little too old for that trade.


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    This week’s gratitude is for the ordinary stuff.

    The kind of stuff that doesn’t feel important while it’s happening.

    My niece asking me to take her to the store because she wanted apples.

    So we went and bought apples.

    Then came home.

    And she didn’t want apples anymore.

    Naturally.

    ☠️

    My nephew refusing to sit properly on the couch, flipping off of it, and hitting his head on the table.

    Me calming him down.

    Checking for booboos.

    “Does it hurt?”

    Shakes head no.

    “Was it scary?”

    Nods yes.

    “Are you going to listen and sit your butt on the couch now?”

    Nods yes.

    Lesson learned.

    At least temporarily.

    😂

    Clifford the Big Red Dog.

    Two little kids sitting at the computer with Uncle while he begins the very important work of corrupting the next generation into gamers.

    Bubble baths.

    Ball-pit balls.

    A bowl.

    And an empty conditioner bottle I specifically saved because my niece was upset the last time I committed the unforgivable crime of throwing away an empty body-wash bottle.

    Running around outside until Doodoo was so exhausted that his tantrum about coming inside lasted approximately long enough for him to get into bed and pass out.

    Mawmaw Nesi trying to clean the kitchen and somehow acquiring two tiny assistants.

    Dance parties.

    Cartoons.

    Cuddles.

    Ribs.

    Laundry.

    Kids running through the house.

    My boyfriend on his game.

    Me on the couch.

    Nothing particularly extraordinary.

    Just life happening around me.

    And sometimes I think those are the weeks I’m most grateful for.

    Not because everything went perfectly.

    God knows it didn’t.

    But because there are people in my house.

    There’s noise.

    There’s laughter.

    There are tiny shoes somewhere they absolutely do not belong.

    There are cartoons playing.

    Someone is hungry even though they ate seventeen minutes ago.

    Someone needs something.

    Someone is laughing.

    Someone is yelling.

    Someone is probably getting into something they shouldn’t.

    And someday, I know I’m going to miss the noise.

    So for now?

    I’m grateful for it.

    Even when it’s loud.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    Apparently eggs have decided to become recurring characters in Sunday Things.

    I would like them written out of the show.

    Immediately.

    If you remember last week, I had a cake-related mental breakdown that required—

    among other things—

    TWENTY-TWO EGGS.

    I thought that was the end of my egg-related suffering.

    It was not.

    This morning, Doodoo got up coughing.

    Not unusual.

    He hasn’t been feeling great.

    His ears have probably been bothering him since getting his tubes put in, and the poor baby has been cranky.

    Then he started coughing harder.

    And harder.

    And harder.

    Until—

    HE PUKED.

    Okay.

    Fine.

    Kids puke.

    I can handle puke.

    Except he puked:

    On himself.

    On the couch.

    And—

    ON MY FUCKING PHONE.

    🤢

    And do you know what he had eaten?

    Eggs.

    Of course he had.

    FUCKING EGGS.

    😭😂

    I already hate eggs.

    The smell.

    The texture.

    All of it.

    And somehow—

    somehow—

    I have now discovered a version of eggs I hate significantly more.

    Regurgitated eggs.

    On my phone.

    There are experiences in life that change you as a person.

    Marriage.

    Having children.

    Buying your first home.

    Losing someone you love.

    And apparently—

    cleaning egg vomit out of your phone.

    I will never be the same.

    🤮

    Doodoo, meanwhile?

    Fine.

    Of course.

    Because children will violently expel the contents of their stomach onto your personal belongings and then approximately seventeen minutes later be like:

    Anyway, what are we doing today?

    😂

    We had originally talked about taking the boys to the splash pad.

    After the Great Egg Incident of 2026, we decided maybe a chill day inside was the better option.

    And honestly?

    Good call.


    Now it’s Sunday afternoon.

    The boys have napped.

    They’ve eaten.

    Doodoo seems to be feeling better as the day goes on.

    Mawmaw Nesi has somehow turned kitchen cleaning into a group activity.

    Uncle is on his game.

    I’m on the couch.

    The boys are running around the house playing.

    And after spending most of the beginning of this week lying in bed sick, I somehow ended it with two nephews, a niece, multiple sleepovers, Power Rangers, Jurassic Park, dance parties, ball-pit bubble baths, approximately forty-seven meals, and vomited eggs on my phone.

    So.

    Progress?

    😂

    It’s only 1:30 as I’m writing this, but I already know how I want the rest of today to go.

    Take the boys home.

    Come back.

    Put away the rest of the laundry.

    Maybe.

    Let’s not make promises we can’t keep.

    😂

    Update the blog.

    Sit on the couch.

    Watch my boyfriend and his friend play their game.

    Eat dinner.

    Go to bed.

    Nothing exciting.

    Nothing productive.

    Nothing that requires me to clean bodily fluids off an electronic device.

    Just a quiet Sunday evening.

    Because after this week?

    I think I’ve earned one.

    😮‍💨🍷

    Here’s to nice, relaxing Sundays.

    And to next week hopefully containing significantly fewer bodily fluids.

    And eggs.

    Please, for the love of God—

    no more fucking eggs.

    Until next time,

    —Destiny

    P.S. Last week, eggs nearly broke me. This week, they came back for revenge. 😂

  • Sunday Things #6

    I think I accidentally opened a daycare this week.

    I don’t remember applying for a license.

    I don’t remember filling out any paperwork.

    But there were three children in my house for most of the week, somebody was always coughing, somebody was always pooping somewhere they weren’t supposed to, and at one point I had two children sitting in a bathtub full of ball-pit balls.

    So.

    I’m pretty sure that makes it official. 😂

    Last Sunday, I ended Sunday Things by deciding my dirty laundry could become Monday’s problem.

    Apparently Monday saw that and said:

    Oh, you think laundry is your biggest problem? Cute.

    Because this week had everything.

    Sick babies.

    A sick boyfriend.

    Very little sleep.

    Poop.

    Pee.

    Bubble baths.

    A friendship conversation that somehow lasted approximately four business days.

    And a cake that nearly broke me psychologically.

    But before we get to that—

    there was one very important development this week.

    One I have been waiting patiently for.

    Very.

    Patiently.

    ahem.

    SEX IS BACK ON THE TABLE.

    😂😂😂

    After surgery, recovery, restrictions, and my hoohoo essentially being placed on administrative leave, she has officially returned to active duty.

    Was I a little sore afterward?

    Yep.

    Was it worth it?

    BABBBBBYYYYY.

    😂

    Unfortunately, the universe apparently decided once was enough.

    Because immediately afterward, my house became a plague ward full of sick children, sleepovers, coughing, snot, and eventually a sick boyfriend.

    So that was Monday.

    And that was also the end of that.

    😩😂

    Honestly, that pretty much establishes the tone for the entire week.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    The kids.

    Which is a ridiculous answer considering they were also responsible for approximately 87% of the chaos.

    But still.

    My niece and both nephews spent most of the week with me, and somehow my house became their house.

    There were sleepovers.

    Cartoons.

    Cuddles.

    Snot.

    A truly concerning amount of bodily fluids.

    And a ball-pit bubble bath.

    That one happened by accident.

    My niece was trying to poop.

    My nephew was annoying her.

    Naturally, I put him in the bathtub.

    As one does.

    He wanted water.

    Then she wanted in.

    Then she wanted bubbles.

    I didn’t have bath toys.

    But I did have an empty body-wash bottle, a bowl, and an entire bag of ball-pit balls.

    And that is how Ball-Pit Bubble Bath™ was born.

    They loved it.

    More importantly?

    They weren’t getting on my nerves.

    😂

    We did it again Friday.

    Apparently this is just something we do at NeeNee’s house now.

    We also watched The Fairly OddParents, Jurassic Park, and Rugrats.

    Or, more accurately, I watched The Rugrats Movie while one kid slept in the recliner, one slept in the playpen, and another sat on the potty.

    I looked around at one point and thought:

    Yep.

    This seems about right.

    There was also something really sweet about watching my boyfriend with them this week.

    At one point, he was curled up in the recliner with my niece and youngest nephew watching Gabby’s Dollhouse.

    Later, everybody was watching CaseOh.

    I love how much those kids love him.

    And how much he loves them right back.

    Even if one of them apparently infected him with the plague.

    Which brings me to something I still cannot get over.

    This man has survived me having COVID multiple times.

    Kissed me.

    Ate after me.

    Shared a bed with me.

    Nothing.

    A ONE-YEAR-OLD GETS A RUNNY NOSE?

    Man down.

    Absolutely defeated.

    I’m still salty about it.

    🤣


    📸 Through My Lens

    If I had taken one photograph that could somehow capture this entire week, it would probably look like this:

    One child headbutting something.

    Another biting someone.

    My niece yelling something wildly inappropriate.

    My boyfriend coughing in the background.

    Me holding a roll of paper towels wondering whose bodily fluid I am currently cleaning off my floor.

    And Rugrats playing somewhere in the distance.

    😂

    My one-year-old nephew spent Monday walking around saying:

    “Well, shit.”

    Meanwhile, my four-year-old niece has apparently expanded her vocabulary to include:

    “You mother fucker.”

    Beautiful.

    Educational.

    We’re doing great over here. 🥲

    Then came the poop.

    My niece has been battling constipation again, which eventually turned into her pooping twice in her panties, once in her pull-up, and once on my floor.

    My nephew peed on the floor.

    At that point I stopped asking questions.

    This house has seen things.

    But there were softer moments mixed into all of it.

    My best friend stopped by before moving to Tennessee to start a new career.

    The kids curled up everywhere.

    We watched old cartoons.

    We invented ridiculous bath-time traditions.

    And somewhere between the snot, potty accidents, and sleep deprivation, I realized how much I love having this kind of chaos in my house.

    Not permanently.

    Let’s not get carried away.

    😂

    But someday?

    Yeah.

    Someday.


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    Sometimes clarity is weird.

    I had a conversation with a longtime friend Tuesday night that somehow managed to make things clearer and more confusing at the exact same time.

    Nothing was really said outright.

    Nothing was completely answered.

    And yet I walked away understanding certain parts of our friendship better than I had before.

    Then we talked Wednesday.

    And Thursday.

    And basically all day in between.

    At some point I realized:

    Sir.

    I think we have officially exceeded the recommended weekly dosage of one another.

    😂

    But I’ve been thinking about how strange long friendships are.

    Especially the ones that have changed shape a hundred times.

    There are people who knew versions of us that don’t exist anymore.

    People who remember things we’ve forgotten.

    People who can disappear for stretches of time and somehow return to a conversation that feels like it never completely ended.

    Sometimes you think you understand what someone has been to you.

    Then one conversation shifts the angle slightly.

    Nothing necessarily changes.

    You just see it differently.

    I don’t know that every relationship in our lives needs a perfect definition.

    Maybe some of them just need honesty.

    And occasionally—

    a little fucking space.

    😂


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    This week’s gratitude belongs to a hug.

    A very small hug.

    A side hug, actually.

    And it meant more to me than that kid will probably ever realize.

    Today was my friend’s son’s surprise birthday party.

    He isn’t a touchy kid.

    At all.

    Hugs aren’t really his thing.

    So when I was getting ready to leave and he asked me for a side hug, I threw that helium tank down so damn fast.

    😂

    His dad looked genuinely shocked.

    Then asked him if he was feeling sick.

    🤣

    But I got my hug.

    And after everything that went into this weekend—the planning, decorating, shopping, baking, failing, trying again, wanting to quit, and somehow eventually making everything work—that tiny moment was the thing that mattered most.

    The cake was almost gone before I left.

    The kids were asking me for the recipe.

    He had fun.

    But that hug?

    That’s the part I’m keeping.

    There are some moments that look incredibly small from the outside.

    You have to know the person to understand how big they really are.

    I knew.

    His dad knew.

    And I think he knew, too.

    That was enough.

    🥰


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    THE FUCKING CAKE.

    Oh my God.

    The cake.

    What began as:

    I’m going to make a tornado picking up a dump truck!

    eventually became:

    I have made a terrible mistake.

    😂

    First, the cake wasn’t big enough.

    Fine.

    We need more cake mix.

    My mom went to the store.

    She came home with two boxes.

    I dumped everything into the bowl.

    Started mixing.

    Looked at it.

    Something wasn’t right.

    I looked at the box.

    Brownies.

    🥲

    So.

    Now we had brownies.

    My sister ordered actual cake mix.

    We checked the boxes this time.

    Because apparently that was necessary.

    Then came Saturday.

    My sister and the kids came over, and what should have been cake decorating became an all-day engineering crisis.

    We tried.

    Failed.

    Tried again.

    Failed.

    Tried AGAIN.

    Failed AGAIN.

    I got mad.

    I wanted to quit.

    We tried again.

    Failed again.

    I damn near cried.

    And then there was the fondant.

    Fuck fondant.

    The fondant made everything too heavy and literally crumbled BOTH CAKES.

    At this point, I was spiritually done.

    We went back to the store.

    Again.

    Bought two more boxes of cake mix.

    Bought more eggs.

    And I decided I would try one. more. fucking. time.

    I scrapped the dump-truck idea.

    Went back to the original idea I had before all of this started.

    And—

    IT WORKED.

    😭😂

    Six boxes of cake mix.

    Two boxes of brownie mix.

    Twenty-two eggs.

    Multiple failed cakes.

    One fondant-induced structural collapse.

    Several trips to the store.

    Approximately seventeen emotional breakdowns.

    And one woman who became increasingly hostile toward baked goods.

    But I made the fucking cake.

    And you know what?

    I was proud of it.

    Then came today’s final boss:

    the thirty-minute car ride to the party.

    I swear I spent the entire drive mentally preparing myself to watch this cake collapse in real time.

    But—

    THE CAKE FUCKING MADE THE TRIP.

    😭😂

    It survived.

    The birthday boy loved it.

    The kids nearly demolished the entire thing before I left.

    Some of them even asked me for the recipe.

    Kids, the recipe is:

    Six boxes of cake mix.

    Two boxes of brownies.

    Twenty-two eggs.

    Rage.

    Denial.

    Several trips to the grocery store.

    And the refusal to let a fucking cake win.

    Enjoy.

    😂


    Now it’s Sunday evening.

    The party is over.

    The cake survived.

    The birthday boy had fun.

    I got my hug.

    The kids are home.

    I’m home.

    And I am officially declaring this week over.

    I don’t care that there are technically several hours left in Sunday.

    Those hours no longer belong to society.

    They belong to me.

    I am putting my phone down.

    I am cuddling up.

    I am watching my boyfriend play Palworld.

    And I am doing absolutely fucking nothing else.

    Because apparently last week’s lesson did not stick, so I’m going to try it again:

    Whatever needs me now?

    Can become Monday’s problem.

    Until next time,

    —Destiny

    P.S. What is something that went completely, spectacularly wrong for you—but somehow worked out in the end anyway?

  • Sunday Things #4

    It’s strange how quickly your definition of a good day can change.

    A couple of weeks ago, a good day probably wouldn’t have been defined by taking a shower without immediately needing to lie down afterward.

    Or being able to leave the house for a few hours.

    Or waking up and realizing the cramps that had been trying to kill me for three straight days were finally gone.

    But apparently, this is where we are now. 😂

    This week was my first full week of recovery, and I am learning that healing has absolutely no interest in being consistent.

    One day, I feel almost normal.

    The next, standing in the shower for a little too long makes me feel like I’ve run a marathon.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of that, my period decided this was the perfect time to show up and make everything approximately 700 times worse.

    My body has been through enough.

    She could’ve sat this month out. 😒

    Still, by the end of the week, things started feeling a little more normal.

    I left the house.

    I saw family.

    My nephews stayed the night.

    I went to a baby shower.

    I picked up my camera again.

    And for a few hours today, I wasn’t sitting around thinking about recovering from surgery.

    I was just…out.

    Doing something.

    Being around people.

    Feeling a little bit like myself again.

    Turns out, I missed her.


    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    Movies in bed.

    My boyfriend renting the new Backrooms movie so we could watch it at home.

    Cuddling in the recliner while watching him play video games.

    My heating pad, even though it completely betrayed me when I actually needed it.

    Naps.

    Clean clothes.

    A long shower.

    And finally reaching the point where getting comfortable doesn’t require rearranging seventeen pillows and negotiating with my abdomen first.

    There is something deeply underrated about the first few days after surgery when ordinary things start feeling ordinary again.


    📷 Through My Lens

    I picked up my camera again this week.

    Not for long.

    Not for some planned photography adventure.

    I took it with me to my friend’s baby shower, and I ended up getting some really good pictures of her.

    And I think I needed that more than I realized.

    After spending so much time in bed or in the recliner, watching the world happen from one spot, it felt really good to look through my camera again.

    To notice light.

    Expressions.

    Little moments worth keeping.

    I’m still healing.

    I’m still limited.

    But apparently my creativity didn’t go anywhere.

    It was just waiting for me to get off the couch. 😂


    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    There’s a weird point in recovery where you start feeling better before you’re actually better.

    And I think I’ve reached it.

    Friday, I had very little pain. After the week I’d had, I felt damn near fully recovered.

    Then I move around too much and my body very quickly reminds me:

    Ma’am.

    You literally just had surgery.

    I’m ready to do things again.

    I’m ready to go places.

    I’m ready to stop thinking about whether something is too heavy for me to lift.

    More than anything, I’m ready to be able to pick up my nephews again. 😭

    But feeling better and being healed aren’t the same thing.

    Unfortunately, my body seems to understand that better than my brain does.

    So, for now, I’m trying to listen when it tells me I’ve done enough.

    Even when I really, really don’t want to.


    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    My sister.

    Without question.

    This period hit me like a fucking freight train.

    Norco didn’t touch the cramps.

    Ibuprofen didn’t touch them.

    My heating pad basically looked at me and said, good luck though.

    Then my sister showed up with Midol and more disposable period panties because she knew I was miserable.

    I could have cried. 🥹

    There are grand gestures of love, and then there is somebody showing up with exactly what you need when you feel like absolute shit.

    I’ll take the second one every time.

    I’m also grateful for my boyfriend, who has spent another week taking care of me, keeping me company, watching movies with me, and generally making being stuck at home suck a little less.

    For my nephews coming over.

    For getting to see friends today.

    For being able to go to my friend’s baby shower, even if I did have to leave a little early when I started getting sore.

    And for my body.

    Even though I have complained about her approximately 4,762 times this week, she’s healing.

    I should probably give her a little credit for that.


    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    Where do I even begin?

    First:

    Today’s poop was easier.

    Listen.

    Post-surgery, you celebrate different milestones. 😂

    Second, I got my period immediately after abdominal surgery because apparently my uterus saw everything else happening down there and said,

    You know what this situation needs? More blood.

    And because I can’t use tampons right now, I have been introduced to the wonderful world of disposable period panties.

    I support free bleeding.

    I really do.

    But I prefer my free bleeding to happen while I am sitting on the toilet like God and plumbing intended.

    Feeling blood slowly leave your body while you’re wearing what is essentially a socially acceptable diaper?

    Absolutely fucking not.

    0/10.

    Hated the experience.

    And finally…

    Today at my friend’s baby shower, we played the game where you guess how big around the pregnant belly is.

    I won.

    I was only off by two inches.

    How did I estimate the measurement so accurately?

    Did I carefully study her belly?

    Use some sort of spatial reasoning?

    Possess an unexplained talent for estimating circumference?

    No.

    I measured my boobs. ☠️☠️☠️

    And apparently my boobs are an excellent unit of measurement.

    I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with this information now that I have it.

    But I won.

    So.

    Science. 😂

    Until next time.

    -Destiny

    P.s.- What’s one little thing that made you feel like yourself again this week?

  • Sunday Things #2

    There’s something about Sundays that makes me look back at the week a little differently.

    The little moments start connecting.

    The random conversations, the small victories, the things that almost got forgotten somehow end up becoming the parts I remember the most.

    This week wasn’t loud.

    But it was full.

    For the first time in a while, I felt ahead instead of behind. I spent a lot of time writing, researching, and creating, and I realized how much I’ve missed having a project that genuinely excites me. History After Dark is quickly becoming one of my favorite things I’ve ever worked on.

    ☕ This Week’s Comfort

    Morning quiet.

    Writing before work.

    Watching Bailey Sarian while my nephews napped.

    And realizing one burned out bathroom light somehow made the room feel…cozier instead of darker.

    📷 Through My Lens

    Saturday’s photoshoot almost didn’t go as planned.

    The rain sent us downtown instead of out to the sunflower field, and honestly, I wouldn’t change it. We ended up with some of my favorite photos we’ve taken.

    Sometimes the backup plan ends up being the better story.

    💭 A Thought I’ve Been Carrying

    I think creativity comes in seasons.

    Some weeks I struggle to write a paragraph.

    This week I finished my first History After Dark article, completed my second, finished all the research for my third, and somehow still found myself writing down ideas for novels after waking up from strange dreams.

    Maybe inspiration doesn’t disappear.

    Maybe it just waits until we’re paying attention again.

    ❤️ This Week’s Gratitude

    I’m grateful my niece was okay.

    I’m grateful my little guy at work caught the ball and threw it back to me. It sounds like such a small thing, but for him, it was huge.

    I’m grateful for tiny milestones—whether it’s hearing my oldest nephew proudly say, “I want my bibi,” or watching another child take his first lunch outside.

    And I’m grateful that I finally found a series I can’t wait to keep writing.

    😂 This Week’s “Well…That Happened.”

    I somehow ended up having a serious conversation about cannibalism.

    I learned I apparently know far too much about the subject.

    I also accidentally corrected someone’s classification of human meat…

    …and they stopped texting me shortly after.

    I’m choosing to believe they just got busy.

    🌱 This Week’s Small Joy

    Feeding a squirrel out of my hand.

    She was tiny.

    She was brave.

    And she absolutely made my day.

    Here’s to another week.

    Hopefully one with fewer hiccups, fewer hospital visits, and fewer conversations where I accidentally sound like I belong on an FBI watchlist.

    Until next time,

    — Destiny

    P.S. What’s one unexpected thing that made you smile this week? I’d love to hear it.